ARTISTS TALKING

# 11 [12 February 2009]

February 12^th continued

I'm showing the dress piece I was working on over Christmas, together with another two that I've made since. The corridor is entirely empty apart from these dresses and four spotlights. I've got them set up at the end of the space, hanging from cotton threads with are sewn into the exposed seams. These in turn hang from a couple of wooden sticks, which is hanging from a single thread from the ceiling. This methods means that the structure of the dresses isn't squashed, but also means that they spin and move when people walk past. I've been thinking about different ways of lighting work since Still Lives in the summer. On this occasion, I've got two different lighting set ups depending on the time of day. When there's plenty of natural light, I've tried to highlight the dresses themselves, to emphasise the subtle colour differences in the fabric. During the evening, I'm lighting them from further away, so that there's a range of shadows. From the end of corridor during this set-up, the dresses themselves seem to disappear, or at least become less visually prominent - you see the shadows first.

I'm not sure how successful this is. Whilst I've gotten quite a bit of positive feedback, there are a couple of things that keep reoccurring - the fact that they are female forms, and that people think they look ghost-like. I chose a female form primarily because I wanted to give an impression of more than just a torso, and with one item of clothing, as I wanted it to hang without a break, and so that it could fade away at the bottom. And at least in Western culture, a dress is the really the only item of clothing that is a total body covering by itself. As far as the ghost comment is concerned, whilst there are ‘ghosts' involved, echoes and traces from unknown people, I'd rather things were a little more subtle than a Boo. (Continues)

# 12 [12 February 2009]

Been rather busy this week, so much so that it's taken me a good hour and a half this morning with a couple of cups of tea to wake up enough to be able to string a series of coherent sentences together.

I'm currently showing some of my work as part of a group exhibition called Re-appropriated Phrases, Sayings and Idioms. It's basically using various parts of the university over about three weeks, with different artists from the MFA course showing each week. So I was hanging that on Monday, sorting out the final things Tuesday morning, followed by a very long but productive meeting with Sarah Tullock, an artist who I'm organising some projects with. Tuesday afternoon I went to a talk by Minty Donald who's just completed a three year research project in Glasgow called Glimmers in Limbo about understanding urban environments and authoritative versions of the past (http://www.glimmersinlimbo.co.uk/). Really, really interesting stuff and rather creepily relevant to the ideas me and Sarah were discussing earlier. She gave quite a clear theoretical framework for her research, which I found really useful - I'm been trying to figure out something for my own work with not too much success so far, so it was useful to see how someone else was relating their practice / research to ideas within geography, anthropology and architecture. Wednesday started off with a talk by George Chakravarthi (http://www.georgechakravarthi.co.uk/index.html), followed by a bit more running around, then me and a couple of the other artists exhibiting in the current group exhibition gave talks about our work.

The space I'm using is a bit odd - it's effectively a corridor with a window along one side, and an area at the far end with a very high ceiling. And a definite lack of electricity points. Add to this the fact that universities are pretty crazy about anything vaguely health and safety related and  you understand why I spent three hours on Monday morning learning about amps, fuses and appropriate cables so that I could extend the wires on my spot lights so as not to used a load of extension leads plugged into one another. (Continues)

# 13 [12 March 2009]

12 March 2009 continued

On a slightly different track, I picked up an old Brownie camera at a market a few weeks back, and I’ve been given some help about how to use it, what film to use etc. I also got a manual for it from the internet, so I’m a bit excited about trying that out at the weekend. A friend of mine has also very generously given me his medium format camera on a bit of a long-term loan, so I’m going to have a play with that too. All this is leading up to photographing the dresses in various locations, one of which is intending to be the interior of this empty library. I was then going to print these images as either tin-types of using liquid light onto various materials – unfortunately I wasn’t successful in my funding application for materials and training for the printing processes, so I’m going to have to come up with a cheaper / DIY version. It’s also becoming a bit tricky as regards coordinating getting into the library, having some help from a friend and borrowing some lighting equipment all for the same dates.

# 14 [12 March 2009]

Been a bit of while since my last post – I’ve been up to my ears in various applications, including a residency, a commission, a collaborative community project (which I did get, usefully). I’ve also been trying to document my work (which unfortunately meant re-hanging the installation a showed a few weeks ago because the first round of photographs was useless – the second set of photos was much better though, see the images which accompany this post), negotiate access to a disused library near to my flat which I want to photograph the interior of, and plan a few workshops I’m supposed to be running. So the actual making of work has been a bit slack in the last few weeks.

All this buzz of activity has got me thinking about the practice / planning / administration / application / everything else balance. I’ve never had a great deal of success with these nationally advertised residencies etc, mainly I’m assuming because so many people apply for them. I was given an application number of 116 one time. The other thing which was becoming more and more apparent as I was writing, is how incredibly difficult it is to explain your work / practice in a way which is suitable for an application process, but which doesn’t sound incredibly dry and boring. It feels as if an overly casual tone sounds a bit naff and rather forced, where as my natural formality for applications comes across as rather unexciting – it’s difficult to get the enthusiasm for a project or idea across. This is of course leading back to some of the reasons I started this blog in the first place. The other thing is, as been especially apparent over the last few weeks, giving all this time over to applications has meant that I just haven’t made much work. So what is better: (and it there a ‘better’?) applying to get work shown / for various advantageous opportunities, or thinking about and making work, with the idea that my work and ideas will improve as a result, thus improving the chances of success with applications? There is of course the other argument, that perhaps I’m just thinking about it all a bit too much, and that that time could be put to better use my thinking about the work itself.

# 15 [16 April 2009]

(16^th April continued)

What has been weird in the last week, is that I finished the community project being aware of how much I work I can make in a really short space of time, and planning to apply some of that urgency and sheer work ethic to my studio practice. But of course, that hasn't happened. I had to catch up with admin that I'd been putting on hold, get my head back into what it is I'm actually doing in my work, plan and deliver a workshop, go to a talk at the Baltic, visit family for Easter, read a pile of essays for some seminars next week.... so hence why at 7pm last night, I was still in the studio and have been since about 9.30am and my list only had the first couple of things ticked off. I know I'm better at working for deadlines, but this is ridiculous.

# 16 [16 April 2009]

 (16th April continued)

Just before the project described above, I managed to negotiate entry into the empty library building I mentioned in my previous post. I spent a weekend hanging my dresses and photographing them and the rest of the interior with my Brownie and borrowed Lubitel, with the help of a friend. I'm pretty pleased with the results (see images attached to post) and also very glad that I gave up on using a digital camera in the first half hour of shooting. I've gotten so used to using a digital camera to document my work, taking loads of shots with varying exposures to get documentation right and checking them immediately, that it felt incredibly liberating not to have to do this. The two cameras I've got are much less accurate - the Brownie leaks quite a bit of light and you've got to work out the exposures (of anything from 2 seconds to five minutes) by referring to chart in the manual I downloaded. The Lubitel is more accurate, but a bit of guesswork is required to get the shot lined up as the viewfinder is through the second lens and it's completely manual, so I've been teaching myself all about handheld light meters and reflective and incident readings.

But not knowing exactly what the shots were going to be like was great. They feel rougher, less precise and I like it where the exposures are out a bit or the shot isn't lined up that well. Everything feels less clinical, less ‘perfect' and I like that. I'm intending to print some of these photographs onto old paper bags, old carrier bags and patterns of the dresses, cut out of pattern paper. The idea is that the photograph becomes an object, and that the material qualities of the support of conceptually relevant to the photographs and the dresses themselves. That's why I'm interested in using quite low value objects, cheap everyday stuff, which has perhaps had another use.... I want to be able to explain or ‘justify' this further, but I'm aware that this could easily become an overly intellectual exercise, and that some of these answers will come about by my making / using the objects and materials.

(continues....)

# 17 [16 April 2009]

(16th April continued)

I really liked the concepts behind the project, the use of stories and memories, plus the collection and use of second-hand materials, as these are all things I'm regularly using in my own work. However, it was a pretty intense project, because after the initial research time of talking to people and collecting stories, there were only three days allowed to make three shrines. It was also a little tricky, because although I (and several other artists) were employed partly as being ‘local', I'm not originally from the North East, so not particularly local. So, you've got that weird thing of making contact with community members so speak to them about their memories, but feeling like you're parachuting in, taking their stories to make ‘art', then swooping out again. There were a few groups of people who were really up for helping with the project, particularly members of the local history society. The theatre company too, have run loads of projects like this, and they seem to make some really interesting performances, so perhaps this occasional uncomfortable feeling came from me not being used to working like this.

The major problem I really had was the level of pay. There are a couple of other blogs on a-n discussing this issue, and it's not what I set up this blog for, but nevertheless, £80 a day is pretty crap however you look at it, especially given the immense range of skills, both artistic and otherwise, required for the job. The reason I got involved despite this, is that I could see ways in which the research from this project could lead into my own work, otherwise I would have avoided it.

(continues....)

# 18 [16 April 2009]

This ‘it's been a bit of while since my last post', is getting to feel a little habitual now. This isn't done intentionally exactly, but I do feel that I ought to be writing something interesting if I'm going to write a post, rather than rambling on pointlessly. Also (as usual) I've been rather busy of late, so haven't had so much thinking time.

I spent a couple of weeks working on (for want of a better phrase) a community art project. I normally cringe at the idea of these, picturing murals in primary colours, but the concept behind this was a bit more interesting, hence my getting involved. I was working on what was effectively a small part of a much larger site-specific theatre project. Basically, myself and several other visual artists and theatre practitioners were working in a couple of areas of Tyneside, speaking to residents about their memories of these areas. These collected stories were then used as concepts for the artists to make memory boxes or ‘shrines', which were then displayed in a local hall. These shrines will then be used as part of the outdoor theatre performance event in the summer.

The theatre company work across the UK and parts of Europe on projects like this which involve using local communities and their stories and memories to form part of the event. Local shops, markets, car boot sales and charity shops provide the majority of the materials for making the shrines, as a way of giving back to the community from where the visuals come from.

 (continues...)

# 19 [29 April 2009]

(29^th April continued...)

I'm making a concerted effort not to effectively realise my ideas in my head, rather than allowing the making process to also inform the concept and content. I can easily talk my way out of making things, by seeing the idea in my mind, and then working it out on paper. This links back to the problems regarding really well-crafted work which is effectively concept-less, or not making anything at all, because it's been thought about so much. I want to make casts of objects because I like the idea of re-making something pre-existing but having it ‘shift' slightly ( I envision this idea like a something I've seen on a film, when an image is overlaid by a repeat of itself, but it's not quite aligned). The problem is that I've never cast an object before, I don't really understand the processes, and it's getting rather frustrating trying to find out the best way of making a mould so it can do what I want it to.

# 20 [29 April 2009]

I had a conversation with an artist about a week ago, who said that what I've been referring to as ‘dresses' aren't actually dresses at all, but are more accurately read as négligés. I spent quite a while trying to think of a way of create a dress which didn't have an obvious historical grounding, as I didn't want to limit the work to something in the past. The reason I went with this particular style is because I saw it as something that could have been worn in the past, but also as something that would be worn today. I chose thin, translucent fabric, as I saw this as a way of suggesting fragility; the lace had references to domestic environments, but also clothing. However, as was pointed out, other the obvious reading, (which had kind of skirted across my thoughts, but not really settled into my conscious), was that flimsy fabric, revealing a body (which in this case isn't actually there) has quite apparent sexual undertones. This wasn't what I was aiming for, and obviously brings into play a whole host of other issues (one of which, interestingly enough, is that négligé is the part participle of the French verb négliger, to neglect. The neglected bit I like, but not in direct association with a female body, which could be used to go down an abuse avenue).

So I'm putting the ‘dresses' on hold for a bit, while I explore some other ideas I've been tossing about. Firstly is the idea of casting some domestic objects out of unsympathetic or materials which seem slightly wrong, so that the cosiness, safety and security associated with home is shifted. I'm thinking along the lines of concrete or porcelain. I've also been preparing a range of possible supports for printing photographs of the library onto - brown paper bags, plastic carrier bags, reclaimed letters and bills. The first time I tried this yesterday was a bit of a disaster, as they all pretty much fell apart as soon as they hit the developer, so I've invested in some waterproof PVA and a subbing and hardening solution.

(Continues...)