ARTISTS TALKING

# 161 [10 February 2010]

Today was a great example of a bad day. I have been having a nice week too and was probably feeling a bit too pleased with myself (brought it on myself). School has been good so far and last night I went to see 'Northern Soul', a photography exhibition at the National Coal mining Museum. It was nice, weather was sunny, had a good walk.

Today was good too - although I was with year three this morning and found them hard work - short attention spans. After school the head and a teacher pulled me in to say a child had fallen on a cocktail stick, it had gone in her wrist and she'd been sent to hospital. Awesome. I gave a million warnings this morning and made sure they were all collected in after the kids had used them to make towers, so one had probably been put in someone's pocket and voila. I feel terrible and even though I have used them over 100 times with no accidents and wasn't there when it happened, the implication is it's all my fault as I brought them into the school. I shall spend some time cutting all the ends off and making them blunt before my next school!

To cheer myself up I went into Wakefield to see 'Collect' curated by Victoria Lucas at Westgate Studios. I like her books a lot and thought that if her curation shows the same sensibilities it would be a very good show. Looked on website and called to find out if it was open, but no answer in either place, so I just went. Of course it is only open 9 -1 so there is no chance of me ever getting to see it! Bugger, but I will maybe try and see if they'll let me in one evening as it would be disappointing to miss it when I'm over in Yorkshire so much. Cue much getting lost and being stuck in traffic afterwards just to add to the mood.

Now I am going to stop moaning and eat something, I may just be hangry (hunger causing anger).

Here's hoping tomorrow will be a bit more cheerful.

# 162 [15 February 2010]

Morning. It is half term. I am not in Yorkshire doing workshops. I did not get up at 5am or drive on the M62 at 15mph in a queue for so long that I couldn't feel my foot. I am a very happy artist.

Apart from the toothpick hospitalisation of a 7 year old, last week ended up being great. The teachers all helped out and really pushed the conceptual side of the work (drawing and modelling yourself as a building based on personality). It can be hard for the kids to grasp, but when pushed they make amazingly thoughtful and often amusing work. Last week was the best school so far in the whole project. My next things for YSP are writing the interim report (next week) and planning the publication, as my print deadline is in May sometime. But it will be banished from my mind this week. It does not exist.

I do have a truckload of work to do however, but it is really meaty good stuff that I am happy to be settling down to. I don't like working in dribs and drabs and I don't think it's good for me either. First - writing, second - cataloguing and third - report writing. For breaks inbetween I shall be carving little bits off my soapstone feet that are slowly emerging.

This week is time to work at home, in my lovely new house that has finally been unpacked. My studio is go, so is the nice clean desk for the computer. Opening the door to the spare room is still fairly treacherous, but we don't talk of it. Not a problem until April when an artist from Linz is coming to stay for a few nights - she has a show in Liverpool with POST (set-up funded by a NAN bursary I think. )

I was reading a really good article about J.G.Ballard in the Guardian on Saturday (based on the Crash exhibition at Gagosian currently) and it made me think  about working habits. I am hopeless at working at home, or I have been, but I hope the new house will allow me the opportunity to break with some bad habits and to be more efficient. This may be foolish, but just humour me please. Apparently Ballard took two daily constitutionals and I thought how amazing that I can go and get my sister's dogs and go for a walk with them anytime. In Liverpool a walk in my local park (Everton) would have involved the walk of doom through the smackhead gates. Theory is that I go outside as a reward for some work done, get fresh air and come back renewed - I'll see how that goes!

Speaking of Liverpool - work on developing the Festival Gardens starts today. I went a lot as a kid because my Auntie busked there and we could go in free. I remember it as some wonderous oversized Charlie and the Chocolate Factory place, although a recent visit through the hole in the fence suggests otherwise. But that dragon slide that you can still see from the road, I used to have dreams about that being filled with water in some underwater land. I think I have got the reality of it (giant pencils as benches! Giant jam jars!) mixed up with the wonder in my head. Either way, I will be sad to see being developed somehow. Working with kids so much recently has really opened up some of these impossible thoughts again - especially looking at the buildings they design.

POST Liverpool: http://www.a-n.co.uk/nan/article/498645/473133

Ballard article: http://www.guardian.co.uk/artanddesign/2010/feb/13/jg-ballard-exhibition-iain-sinclair

Festival Gardens: Pictures from 1984 and 2004, also a short film. The legacy of a "unique riverside parkland gifted to the city and available for all to share" didn't really work out so well then!  http://www.bbc.co.uk/liverpool/capital_culture/200...

News report on Garden Festival: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M29ekNg6dyo&feature...

Dan Simpkins and Penny Whitehead made a really interesting newspaper with contributions from artists, based on the gardens, regeneration and repetition of history within the capital of culture. See more about that and get a free copy here: http://www.danielsimpkins.net/main/future/future1....

# 163 [15 February 2010]

I should stop. I have been bent over the computer all day and wrist/arm/neck have had enough. I am writing profiles on four artists and an essay - so lots to get on with. I have transcribed three of the conversations I recorded for this at various points over the last few months, but one I foolishly recorded in a cafe and have been struggling to hear! Today it went through some extra speakers I rigged up at home and apart from the odd irritating waiter and background laughing, I managed to get it all - finally. It's taken most of the day and I am done in but this artist is interesting and I don't want to miss him out! Progress should be a bit more swift tomorrow.

I found myself at the weekend doing something unexpected: reading through empty shops guidelines and application procedures from Liverpool Council. I did say I was allowed to curate/organise one event this year (to stop it taking over my life) and I think I have figured out what it is. I'm still not sure about the whole shop thing, but for the exhibition subject it is actually a pretty perfect setting. All of things that I have put on in Liverpool have been at borrowed/empty properties and it is a pretty standard way of going about things here as the city has been half empty for ages. In this case, it just means that the council are putting money into grass roots and artists that maybe should have been part of the capital of culture. I have started contacting artists, but I am taking it slowly - I know how stressful these things can be and the hidden work that's involved! Exciting stuff though..

Lastly, some good news: the curator who invited me to show in Milan as part of Showreel has been in touch about a possible group show in Stuttgart in October. Seems like the autumn may involve a bit of European inter-railing or something with Milan, Stuttgart and possibly Linz on the list. Stuttgart is also very close to Strasbourg, where I did a bit of my degree, I would so love to revisit! My mum was on about a short trip to Istanbul too... hmmm, I'd better earn some money if any of this is going to happen!

# 164 [16 February 2010]

I think I still have two days of editing ahead. I am very quick to write, but I am, as usual, way over word count and it always takes me longer to sort it all out afterwards. I am very lucky that my husband is a grammar nazi and will not tolerate my sloppy syntax :)

Really enjoying myself, especially as I have lovely french-lined notebook and mechanical pencil on the go. I try to do my writing on the laptop - but I can't see it in my head the same way as if I've written it by hand. I like to have sweeping arrows connect things, make texty flowcharts and asterisk the hell out of bits as afterthoughts. I don't see connections as quickly if the text has to be scrolled up and down. Give me a big sprawling A3 notebook any time.

I like working from home. I am the calmest I have been for weeks. I have accepted that my lunch break has to coincide with neighbours and home & away. I blame my friend (?) Rebecca for this: she started me on Neighbours while we were doing our MA in Wimbledon and then stopped watching it herself. To me this is akin to starting your mate smoking and then giving up, I am left with a life-long habit. Thanks Rebecca. 

Have been for a lovely sunny walk this morning and was wondering how my new rural abode will change things. I grew up in this village too so all of a sudden everyone know me and stops for a chat - a massive change from Liverpool/London/Japan etc. Do artists in the countryside make different work to those in the city? I remembered Rosemary Shirley had written something about this a while ago, but I'll have to see if anything changes for me.....

http://www.a-n.co.uk/publications/shortcut/article...

http://beccafoster.co.uk/home.html

# 165 [17 February 2010]

I am a little distracted as I have just discovered a secret bit of recording at the end of one of the conversations with an artist in the Salzamt.

I go out of the room and I presumed that was the end, but I just left it playing today and found out that was not the case! Jens must have picked up the phone recording us (it gets very loud) and he's giggling and making lots of sound effects, mixed in with some swearing followed by 'shit, she's coming back' and clang goes the phone back on the table. Made me miss him a lot and I have also been laughing heartily.

Also found out we are getting a cat on Monday! Very excited. This is my friend Tracey's cat who is being adopted as she has to live with three basset hounds at the moment! She is extremely fluffy and will hopefully enjoy the surrounding fields and being my companion.

# 166 [18 February 2010]

KNICKER BLOG.

The postman has just brought me a lovely package from a-n, my prize for being one of the blogs of the year. Inside was a copy of Rachel Howfield's artist's book 'What a Waste of a Day' and an extra surprise - a pair of knickers!

I should fill in some background here. It started with a group friends from uni (eca), four of us that used to always buy each other knickers as presents. It became a bit ridiculous so that they would get more and more elaborate until they were festooned with ribbons and bows and ruffles and patterns to make your eyes bleed.

When I was doing the residency at Hospitalfield in Arbroath we had to use the laundrette. I found out near the end that I was known to the staff as the knicker-lady. One of the elderly women who did the folding said to me that I had the most incredible collection of unmentionables she had ever seen. A great compliment if ever there was one. But I believe these small things can change the way you feel and make a difference to your day, laugh at me if you want, I don't care because I have ribbons.

The pair from Rachel come with a tag for hanging instructions:

·         Fling onto lampshade

·         Hang off bedpost

·         Pin to the wall

·         Hide in your knicker drawer

·         Drape casually over the back of the sofa

I'm wondering whether a knicker wall may come into being... 

Incidentally I am off to Lincoln this weekend for a reunion with said Edinburgh friends so the post feels very timely.. I think I may have to pop to the shops before I go!

I should also mention that sewn into the gusset there is a tiny panel with a picture of a fire sign saying 'Fire hose keep clear'. Excellent stuff. Thanks Andrew, a-n and Rachel!

http://www.axisweb.org/artist/rachelhowfield

# 167 [24 February 2010]

Jack Hutchinson had tweeted some interesting stuff about internships when I had a look this morning. The BBC have done a report on the growing number of unpaid internships (in all professions). They reckon 90% of internships are unpaid and 60% of interns say their experiences were in no way beneficial.

Video here:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/8518617.stm

That's not great is it? They interviewed one of the founders of Interns Anonymous, so get adding your experiences on there if you have anything to say:

http://internsanonymous.co.uk/

The Arts Groups have just launched a report on internship called 'Emerging workers: a fair future for entering the creative industries'

http://www.artsgroup.org.uk/2010/01/emerging-worke...

As for me, I am having a slow morning today, partly because I couldn't get up! Husband left me in bed so was a bit disoriented when I finally woke!

Went to Blackpool to do a talk on my work to Illustration & Fine Art students yesterday, then I took a small group for an artists book workshop in the afternoon. It was lovely and they came up with some very clever and thoughtful ideas. There was talk of whole bookbinding day at the beginning of the year on October, which would be great for them. I also had some really kind emails waiting when I got home, from students thanking me, thanks!

I also popped in to the Grundy gallery while in Blackpool to drop off a CD of images from the Collaborate & Make project I did there in January. Their current exhibition 'Magic Show' touring from the Hayward is worth a visit. Sinta Werner has been commissioned to make a site-specific piece and it's awesome! She is the next artist in the Showreel series in Milan that I am doing, so I was keen to see her stuff. I think Alice Channer's work, which she showed at Showreel in Milan back in December is in Frieze next month so I must remember to buy a copy...

http://www.grundyartgallery.com/

http://www.sintawerner.de/

http://www.showreelproject.com/artisti.html

In other non-art related news, we have a cat. She is lovely, but mainly under the sofa at the moment. She is adopted from a friend and very nervous. She was living with three basset hounds so is stll waiting for the dogs here and is very suspicious of doors. Hopefully we can give her a non doggy life where she can chill out a bit! Luckily Dan is a cat whisperer so they are already firm friends.

# 168 [25 February 2010]

I keep looking at the Arts Council consultation and trying to do it... but there's so much reading to it and I have too much report writing to do for YSP at the moment.

http://www.artscouncil.org.uk/consultation/taking-...

You can have your say until 14th April. I will do it, I will.. can't really moan about artist not being represented if I don't can I?

# 169 [26 February 2010]

A friend sent me this link yesterday:

http://jangosteve.com/post/380926251/no-one-knows-...

basically he defines the FRAUD COMPLEX; something I think a lot of people suffer from, especially artists (me included). It's difficult as there are hardly any measureable successes in this business, so if you do well, sometimes you can't pinpoint why exactly and there is no guarantee of replicating that. Everything seems subjective and uncertain and precarious and so on ad infinitum....

At a discussion group at Royal Standard last month - about what inspires us to make - the fraud complex business came up and most people nodded a bit.

In the blog post, he defines knowledge by shit you know, the shit you know you don’t know, and the shit you don’t know you don’t know. I have a lot of the middle one; shit I know I don't know, which can be intimidating, especially when you presume everyone else does know it. This often leads to not trying things or writing off your best ideas before they have chance because you presume you will probably fail. It also means that you know something isn't right, but you can't necessarily fix it. I have this a lot when I read back through things. I know it's not right, but I am me and I will probably write the same thing again, even though my head tells me otherwise.

Also - this new blog on artists talking looks like it might shape up to be interesting...

Critical Creative Support Campaign by Mark Brereton

http://www.a-n.co.uk/artists_talking/projects/sing...

# 170 [2 March 2010]

Offline for two days and it was when everything needed to be emailed. Anyway, much hurried emailing of reports and things that hadn't sent because they were too big.. silly girl.

This is interesting and worrying..

Margaret Hodge: the arts are a 'closed shop'

http://tinyurl.com/ycu9q96

"someone who works for a major gallery told me that the same thing is happening at their workplace: people are being made redundant and replaced by unpaid interns."

I know someone whose contract hasn't been replaced at the gallery where she works and she is sure that she will replaced by interns. It's so insulting!

In other news; some good news, but further updates when I know more!