ARTISTS TALKING

# 172 [3 January 2012]

Sporting League: Game 28

Bayerns and Tranquilayers both had penalties either side of half time in a match that failed to live up to it's lofty expectations. Sporting Radio Pundit X: 'We didn't see the best of the top two with that performance. I think Tranquilayers possibly shaded it and will come away from the game the happier of the two sides.'

There were a series of arrests as Universo defeated Indentine by a goal to nil.

A Sporting police spokesman quoted by Millington Consortia said that the arrests came "after multiple warnings by police were given to both sets of supporters to stay within their designated zones within the stadium."

The Sporting League will fine both clubs and stated that all future Indentine versus Universo games will take place behind closed doors.

Sporting Radio Pundit X: 'I've been sayin' it all season that there is a bit of a bitter streak creeping back into the Universo following like the old days. I think that they sweep it all under the carpet for marketing purposes but you can't go about gilding a violent lily.'

# 171 [28 December 2011]

Sporting League: Game 27

Red Star have confirmed the official request to leave The Sporting League at the end of the 2011-2012 season. Red Star gaffer: 'The financial situation is sucking the life out of our club. It would seem that the big money goes to the big teams. I'm forever trying to explain to our loyal supporters that we've got no chance of winning another title under the current Sporting regime. 1990 - our championship winning season ain't gonna happen again...it's a wall of fire.'

 The reds meanwhile took some time away from the gloomy outlook of the boss with a goal to nil win over relegated Indentine.

Tranquilayers conceded a late  at home to Novia to draw one - one. The result meant that their lead at the summit was cut to just a single point.

Bayerns enjoyed their trip to the Pacifica coast with a three goals to one victory.

Sporting Radio Pundit X: 'Bayerns look as though they've stepped up a gear. I think it's going to get very interesting as we hit the business end of the season.'

# 170 [20 December 2011]

Sporting League: Game 26

Tranquilayers came back from a goal down to sweep aside Athletico and send a stark warning to their title rivals Bayerns. Tranquilayers boss: 'I asked for one hundred percent out there and got one hundred and ten from the players. It was always gonna be a bit of a banana skin going over to Athletico stadium. I would've been happy with the draw but our second goal was something to behold.'

Eternal beautiful slackers Novia moved back into the lucrative third position with a two goals to nil win over Pacifica. Novia boss: 'I had a great feeling when I woke up this morning. I travelled to the ground on my dusty skateboard...and there was just...I don't know...there was a feeling in the air. I'm lookin' forward to playin' at the Pacifica ground next season as the surfin' waves are gonna be the highest since the summer of 1988. Time to dust down the ol' surfboard methinks.'

Bayerns showed little mercy as they plunged Drakens into deeper trouble with a one - nil victory.

Olby trading standards (OTS) received payments from online loans broker MMGT in exchange for regulatory advice. The Sporting League confirmed that it was aware of the situation and commenced preliminary investigations.

# 169 [10 December 2011]

Sporting League Season 2010 – 2011

Tranquilayers did just enough to overcome 1998 champions Lunderbach with just a penalty separating the sides.

Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘I’m unsure about Tranquilayers at the moment. They kind of look like they’re on the edge of collapse but are somehow holding it together. I think their midfield has weakened over the past few games and the away match against Athletico will give us a bit of a clue as to the extent of their decline.’

Bayerns were involved in a see-saw match against Saints – eventually emerging from the amiptheatre as five goals to two victors. Bayerns boss: ‘Our defence was really poor today – it’s just as though all those training sessions were for nothing.’ However, I’ve got to sing the praises of our young strike force as we’re now the top scorers in the league.’

Pointeso continued their strong form with a five goals to nil win over Indentine. Pointeso boss: ‘I was getting fed up with reading all that nonsense in the press about our players partying antics before big matches – that’s why I banned all nights out for the rest of the season. They’ve gotta be disciplined. They were reprimanded for their behaviour and were left in no doubt that we’re a club on the up and if they’re not happy with the situation…there’s always the Colbreck League.’

The Sporting League council has authorised the use of additional funds to help prevent the Universo dollar strengthening further, as figures show a slowdown in the growth of industrial output.

# 168 [25 November 2011]

Sporting League 2010 - 2011

Game 24

Tranquilayers resumed their business as usual policy win an away win at Olby to keep them three points clear of their nearest rivals.

Bayerns edged past Haaveno to retain their position of second in The Sporting League. Sporting Radio Pundit X: 'Haaveno had a point to prove after their dismal display against Novia and as a result gave the bayerns a run for their money. To be honest though, I got the feeling that Bayerns could have stepped up a gear at any point. I think it was a bit of an energy conservation exercise on their part.'

Champions Universo moved up into the big bucks position of third with a two goals to nil win over Delta. Universo boss: 'I heard that the Delta board haven't paid their players for a month now. I've also heard that their shares have gone through the roof - so I'll be keeping my eyes open at the next Delta champagne bash for any further signs of hardship. I've already made it public that if the Delta supporters club need any support organising demonstrations - they've got our full support.'

Saints safety looked pretty much assured despite squandering a goal to nil lead with some sloppy defending. Saints gaffer: 'We got caught at a corner and against a quality team like that you get punished. I'm still proud of the way we maintained our resolve for the rest of the match though...'



# 167 [24 November 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 23

Tranquilayers tasted their first defeat of the season to fifteenth placed Metronova. Metronova boss: ‘Yeah, we put in a good shift today. We’ve been studying the Tranquilayers videos and have noticed their weakness on the left hand side. I can’t think of a side with a strong defence in the league this season…’

Bayerns took advantage of the leaders slip up with a three – nil will over woods folk Green Tree.

Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘I heard a lot of stuff coming from the woods suggesting that Green Tree would stifle Bayerns but they just didn’t turn up for work. I think the problem with Green Tree was that they’d replaced their traditional man to man marking for the ol’ zonal checking. The Bayerns forwards had easy pickings…’

Athletico maintained their good form with a two goals to one win over Saints that moved them into the top three.

Novia dished out their biggest win of the season against a deflated Haaveno side. Haaveno boss: ‘We conceded too many stupid goals, I thought the man marking would’ve helped against their strike force but it wasn’t to be. We need to stay focused now if we want to hold onto our place in the league next season.We have had a lot of opportunities in the past without executing the final ball and for me that has happened in a lot of games. It goes without saying that wasn’t the case today.’

# 166 [23 November 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 22

Tranquilayers put in a watertight defensive shift as they held on against the tricky Red Star forward line to win by a goal to nil after a luck ricochet separated the teams.

Bayerns got their sweet revenge at the intimidating Universo stadium – the scene of their Sporting failure last season with a two goals to one win. Bayerns boss: ‘Well that keeps us hanging onto the coat tails of Tranquilayers. It was a professional performance from our second string squad.’

Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘I was outside the Universo ground at the end of the match. There was a lot of trouble, coins being thrown, I could literally taste spray paint in the air. I don’t care what’s changed regarding the Universo culture over the years but there is still a violent undercurrent once you go down the back streets surrounding the stadium…scary stuff.’

Novia turned the leaves brown at Green Tree with a four goals to nil away win in what was a truly cracking game.’

# 165 [22 November 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 21

Pacifica had a great first half against Tranquilayers but the quality showed in the end as the away side took the points with a two goals to nil win.

Bayerns held onto second position as they recorded two goals to nil win over Indentine.  Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘I thought Indentine held up the ball pretty well but it was only a matter of time before Bayerns carved out their opportunities.’

Champions Universo Collunteen remained in third place as they defeated Novia by two goals to one away from home.

2001 to 2003 champions Delta found themselves on the wrong end of a four goals to one hammering by team of the future Pointeso.  Delta chairperson: ‘it was a sad day for us out there at home. I look back to when we were just like Pointeso, young, strong and full of vitality. I think that game will strike a chord with all our supporters. It was the game where Pointeso set the blueprint for the future. I think that was the best I’ve ever seen a side play in Sporting football – that includes all of our great sides in the past.

Veenok have announced that they will attempt a renewed bid for control of Sporting Athlete...

# 164 [20 November 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 20

Universo Collunteen fudged a pass with seconds to spare which surely would’ve bagged them the points against Athletico. Sporting Radio Pundit L: ‘It was pretty even Steven throughout a game that surely spelled the end of any hopes of a Universo challenge. Surely there will come a time when the Athleticans will surely relinquish their independent status?’

Bayerns made it reality checkpoint time for Chamber Athlete with a three goals to one away win. Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘Bayerns were way too strong for ‘em. I thought the Chamber boss was a bit dramatic in the post match analysis after a rare win over Athletico. I just don’t understand why he decided to deride us within the press. He had a great chance to enjoy the moment. In fact, I read a piece in The Sporting Times where he had a bit of a dig at me. I’m not sure whether he realises that we’re only here once…anyway.’

Pundit Y: ‘I get the feeling that you don’t get on then? (Studio laughter).

Pundit X: ‘Are you still here? I’d really like to know what’s in your job description.’

Pundit Y: ‘Oh, I don’t think I mentioned that I got the controller job next season – I was out on the ol’ Pointeso tiles last night to celebrate.’

Yop Lane put two goals past Delta leaving their opposition only three points outside of the relegation zone.

Tranquilayers made it twenty games without defeat as they won by a goal to nil over troubled Drakens.

# 163 [18 November 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 19

Bayerns title hope took a severe blow as they were beaten at home by avant garde hipsters Pointeso. Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘I was in the bar across the road from Bayerns stadium after the game and a load of these young Pointeso supporters came in. I don’t know, they make me feel so old. What was all that stuff they were playing on the juke box? As I said, I think it’s all about surface with that lot. I mean, yeah, it’s great to have a bit of fun but when you see the young Pointeso chairperson in the middle of them – well who am I to say?’

Pundit Y: ‘You need to move with the times. I bet you’ve got loads of clothes that would look cool in the depths of your closet!’

Pundit X: ‘What exactly do you get paid to do?’

Tranquilayers extended the gap at the top to six points with a two goals to one away win over Saints.

Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘It’s lookin’ more and more like an early taxi for the Lunderbach boss as his side was turned over by champions Universo Collunteen. I just don’t get it, the tactics were well out. I’m appealing to the lunderbach board to get shut and I’ll keep ‘em up till the end of the season. It’s breakin’ my poor heart at the moment.’