ARTISTS TALKING

# 158 [12 November 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 13

Resurrection kids Athletico completely dominated Bayerns in the humidity of Athletico stadium. Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘I like the atmosphere the new athletican boss is spreading around Athletico city. I went there on a bit of business the other week, and I don’t know, there is just a bit of a feelin’ about the place.’

Pundit Y: ‘Did you get the ol’ bubbly out again? I know you’ve got a bit of a reputation on the circuit for your social networking…’

Pundit X: ‘Aye, when you’ve got y’self some contacts come back and we’ll talk again.’

Pundit Y: ‘Funny you should say that…I’ve been invited to the Triangular convention to represent this very station. I guess they’ve got me earmarked for voice of the future.’

Pundit X: ‘Okay, okay, are we gonna get back to the show or what then? I wonder why I didn’t get an invite.’ (Background laughter).

Tranquilayers were held in the other big match of the day as they grafted to a two – two draw with hipster chique kids Pointeso.

# 157 [11 November 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 12

Bayerns and  Tranquilayers extended the gap at the top to five points with victories over Lunderbach and Yop Lane respectively.

Sporting Radio pundit X: ‘I think, maybe, the ol’  Yoppites game the Trankies a run for their money out there. Now look, they’re only a small club in comparison…it…it…just gets to me when I hear the Tranquilayers supporters shouting the odds. Ye know, The Sporting League should be all about embracing the newer clubs. There still seems to be a lot of resentment about Yop Lane being the first team to defect from The Colbreck league – and some so-called Tranquilayers supporters couldn’t stop the chanting for 'em to get back to The Colbreck... Come on, the Yoppites have earned their stripes – lets just let bloody bygones be bygones eh?’

Athletico created chaos in the Novia defence with some magical play from the fallen giants. Athletico boss: ‘Yee man…we’re goin’ thru transitional times. We need to be given time…don’t worry…get yourselves some true faith press dogs. I’ll try stuff out, I’ll experiment and bring a bit of the old school vibe about the gaff again. Trustez moi!’

# 156 [10 November 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 11

Pointeso continued their rise through the Sporting ranks with a goal to nil win over bottom of the table Drakens.

Sporting Radio Pundit L: ‘I think I witnessed a goal out there today from Sporting utopia. Seriously. Pointeso may struggle to win the league this season but we’re lookin’ at a major force over the next five years – mark my words.’

Champions Universo moved into sixth position after a three one win over woodsmen Green Tree.

Universo gaffer: ‘I think it’s important for us to stick with the Universaire philosophy of read, mark, learn and Sportingly digest.’

# 155 [8 November 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 10

Bayerns remained undefeated as they swept aside Metronova with an unflattering two goals to one score line.

Tranquilayers gave Sporting Athlete a real wake up call with a well earned two goals to one win. Tranquilayers boss – ‘In light of the financial implications imposed spending restrictions, to find ourselves second at this stage of the season is highly commendable.

Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘I was at the Olby game over the weekend against Novia. I had a bit of a revelation to be honest. Take a look at Olby….whatever happened to their strike force eh? I’d be interested to see if their board get the cheque book out and plump for a marquee signing in the transfer window.’

# 154 [3 November 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 9

The match between Sporting leaders Bayerns and Tranquilayers finished as a two – two draw. Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘I was thinkin’ that that game had a draw written all over it. You should’ve checked on the Tranquilayers boss’s sconch at the end of the game…looked well hissed off mate.’ I asked me ol’ mate in downtown Sporting City in one of the bookies on Hutoni strip how he’d priced up the match before kick off. You’ll be intrigued to learn (well I was anyway) that all bets on the draw were closed twelve hours prior to kick off. I think you could’ve got a 7-5 shout before they pulled up the drawbridge on it.’

Athletico began creaking through the gears as they edged their tussle with fallen heroes Olby by two goals to one.

Red Star held onto their forth position in spite of a one goal to nil win over Lunderbach. Red Star gaffer: ‘Abject, abject and erm…abject!’

# 153 [1 November 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 8

Novia saw their gaffer sent off as they conceded a dubious injury time goal against Tranquilayers. Novia boss: ‘What do you expect me to say? If I open my trap I’m sure the trusted sporting federation will ban me from the league full stop. Freedom of speech? Smeedom of peach more like!’

Bayerns eased to a two goals to nil victory over fifteenth placed Pacifica. Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘I don’t think the Bayerns players broke into a sweat out there. I felt for the Pacifica boss really. I mean, they had so much potential when they first entered the league and now they’re a side in decline. I guess it’s kinda reflected all along the Pacifica coast. I wouldn’t take my holidays there nowadays – the crime levels have gone through the roof since the financial meltdown.’

# 152 [23 October 2011]

Sporting League 2010 - 2011

Game 7

Bayerns came back from a goal to nil down against Drakens to prevail by two goals to one. Sporting Radio Pundit X: 'I can't recall ever seeing a pitch as bad as that in The Sporting League - they need to be hit with a hefty fine.'

Pundit L:  'Oh come off it, if you start hitting smaller sides such as Drakens with fines then we'll lose the teams that add a bit of much needed character to the league.'

Pundit X: 'There can't be any excuses at this level. The supporters pay out their hard earned dough to watch a mud pie contest. Come on, wake up, get real and smell the coffee buster!'

Tranquilayers put further pressure on the Athleticans with a one - nil victory. Tranquilayers coach: 'I'm really proud of that performance. I'll admit that even I thought it was going to be a draw but we seem to have something else about us this season.'

Pointeso and Universo cancelled each other out and virtually ended one another's championship chances after only seven games. Universo boss: 'It's an uphill struggle for us now. This league can be so unforgiving. I reckon we can aim for a top three finish this year...anything else in a bonus.'



# 151 [20 October 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 6

Bayerns moved to the top of the league after breaking a stubborn Saints defence with just a minute of normal time to spare. Bayerns boss: ‘We’ve got a fantastic forward line. I had to play about with our positions because the defenders had pretty much shut up shop. We’re fortunate enough to have had a striker who could pick their defensive locks. Credit to Saints for holding on for such a long time. We picked up a few knocks out there today.’

Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘I nearly choked on my salmon sarnies up in the Lunderbach executive suite. I know I was gluggin’ the champers, but I could swear that all three of the Tranquilayers goals were offside.’

Universo Collunteen notched up their second win of the season against a tricky Yop Lane. Universo gaffer: ‘I can’t exactly say that I was rubbing my hands with glee at the end of the game, but we did enough to give our campaign a much needed kick start.’

# 150 [14 October 2011]

The Sporting League: Game 5

Sporting Athlete made in five wins in five with a two goals to one home win over Green Tree…Sporting Radio Pundit L:  ‘Money talks in this league. Ultimately from a financial perspective I can’t see Sporting Athlete keeping this run going. I had a long look at Green Tree as well – I just can’t believe they had a top seven finish last season after that display.’

Novia and Saints held onto their unbeaten runs in a high tempo match which resulted in a two – two draw. Novia boss: ‘The Saints are playing some good stuff at the moment but we were under strength. I think Saints will be happy with a top ten finish at the very best this season to be fair.’

Bayerns edged closer to the summit with a one goal to nil win over a jaded Haaveno. Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘I was out on the ol’ golf course over the weekend with the Bayerns chief executive. He looked tanned with a million dollar smile – lovely guy. I think I heard somewhere on the grapevine that Mellsgerz Consortia could be buying a ten percent stake in their shares. I’m tempted to throw a few pennies towards the Bayerns metropolitan myself. As for the match, well did you see the bayerns goal? What a bloody pearler.’

Pundit Y: Just out of curiosity…isn’t there an exec that you haven’t had a round of crazy golf with? I sometimes have my suspicions that you spend your evenings off with the microwave meal for one.’

Athletico squandered their goal to nil lead over Drakens. Athletican supporter: ‘I nearly didn’t bother travelling to the game which would have been the first away fixture that I’d ever missed. I wish I’d stayed at home now. The supporters club has been on at the board for, what, five years now. We need to give up our unique independent status if we’re gonna have any sort of future in this league. Its impossible trying to tell ‘em though.’

Champions Universo recorded their first win of the season with a three goals to two score line against Delta.

# 149 [23 September 2011]

Sporting League 2010 – 2011

Game 4

The Pointeso boss was furious with the ref after cancelling out what appeared to be a legitimate injury time goal. Pointeso boss: ‘What do you want me to say? Tell ya what…read my mind because if I speak it my bank balance will take a hit from the Sporting council. One win in four isn’t cuttin’ it at the mo’…we’ve gotta improve otherwise I’ll be walking the plank over Pointeso bay like my predecessor. We aim big at this club and are aiming for a top three finish. Boy oh boy we’re makin’ hard work of this, I just can’t understand why our board are keepin’ silent at the moment. Tell ya what thio, they won’t be sittin’ up there grinnin’ that’s for sure and I don’t blame ‘em.’

Athletico suffered at the hands of a three goals to one defeat to Saints…Sporting Radio Pundit X: ‘I  know that I keep harping on about this but the Athleticans needed a marquee signing over the summer which never happened. I’ve got my sources and know that they’re independent status give ‘em money to burn when times are tough. So I don’t know why they aren’t thriving in the current Sporting recession.’

Tranquilayers slipped back a couple of places as they could only manage a two – two draw against thirteenth placed Metronova…

Novia boss on Sporting Radio: ‘I like the look of the Haaveno side and felt we got lucky with a two – one win. ‘

Champions Universo Collunteen were still without a win as they slipped up at home to leaders Sporting Athlete. Universo boss: ‘I’ve heard that the posh kids Tranquilayers were shoutin’ the odds about us after they got wind of our below par performance. The thing is, they’re sitting in their penthouses up in the Hilti forest with cash to burn whilst we’re the unlikely Sporting League champions eating pot noodles whilst they chomp on the ol’ caviar….makes ye sick dunnit eh?’

Pundit X: Well I’m rather partial to the ol’ cavvy, and um yes, pot noodles do make me feel a bit queasy.’