DEGREES UNEDITED

# 1 [18 September 2009]

I am still researching my ideas for three-dimensional forms using wax and paper at present, but have started to let the shapes grow in my hand more organically.  

I like aspects of these forms in wax, but they are too floral like at present.  Will try grouping them together then photographing them, this may help.

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I do not have a set picture in my head or even a set medium I just get a sensation that ruminates through my body and I get very frustrated because I cannot  just say it's like this and produce it.  I know lots that I do not want my work to be about and I know some things that it must have.  I want parts to have a delicate fragility, I want to evoke associations with natural forms, I want an interesting surface with strong highs and dark depths.  I know that though ultimately it will be about painting I have to manipulate materials, as this is what is driving through me and causing my frustration.  I worked with clay last module and this (though the item was not liked) helped me realise that I need this swirling rippling crevices and dark holed forms and to be able to create them in some way, I need to physically manipulate while at the same time leaving room for accidental occurrences, 'Happy Accidents' as one tutor calls them.

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The wax is both great, because it melts at body temperature, so once warm is very malleable and desperately fragile and fiddly for the same reason!  In between working I have to keep the wax in the fridge at present.  Hope the kids don't try to eat it, (they have been warned!)

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The grouped together photos are O.K., they still have a strong floral or under sea creature look about them, but these forms are more interesting to me, they are getting closer to the 'something' that I want.

# 2 [21 September 2009]

I do not have a set picture in my head or even a set medium I just get a sensation that ruminates through my body and I get very frustrated because I cannot just say it's like this and produce it.  I know lots that I do not want my work to be about and I know some things that it must have.  I want parts to have a delicate fragility, I want to evoke associations with natural forms, I would like an interesting surface with strong highs and dark depths.  I know that though ultimately it will be about painting I have to manipulate materials, as this is what is driving through me and causing my frustration.  I worked with clay last module and this (though the item was not liked) it helped me realise that I need fragile, undulating and dark holed forms and to be able to create them in some way, I need to physically manipulate while at the same time leaving room for accidental occurrences, 'Happy Accidents' as one tutor calls them.

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The wax I am using is both great,  because it melts at body temperature, so once warm is very malleable and a desperately fragile and  a pain and fiddly for the same reason!  In between working I have to keep the wax in the fridge at present.  Hope the kids don't try to eat it, (they have been warned!)

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The grouped together photos are O.K., they still have a strong floral or under sea creature look about them, but these forms are more interesting to me, they are getting closer to the 'something' that I want.

Started to transcribe in charcoal to see the effect.

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After some hours research, reading blogs on a sculpture web sites etc., seems one of the best ways to keep the wax in between working on it is in water.  Tried this and it seems to work well.  Good job, as I needed to find a new way to store them, the kids squashed some of my sculptures that where in the fridge with their yoghurts!  Bless um, they were only trying to find their favourite flavours!  I know they should have been better boxed!  (The children that is!!) 

# 3 [26 September 2009]

Have trawled the Internet, yet again, and ordered some different kinds of wax to experiment mixing to try to get a wax which melts enough to be moulded by hand but is a little less inclined to wilt at room temperature. Await delivery! Though one was said to be particularly good for mixing, I did not order it, as it was a strong green and this just would not do, (too living plant like, my sculptures would end up looking like cabbage leaves!!)  I went for a white micro-crystalline.  I use a brown wax at times, but prefer the pale yellow one at present.  The brown is a little more sticky than the yellow and so is more messy to work with and more importantly hard to clean up quickly, (when you suddenly realize it's kids pick up time!), but some times the stickiness gives interesting effects as you prize it away from your fingers.  Will consider colour more deeply later just need to get more going first.  I also like the yellow as it gives delicate look and is reminiscent of plants and creatures that survive in complete darkness away from human notice.

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# 4 [12 October 2009]

The posts added today are from over the last couple of weeks. I couldn't update blog as I have technical problems!

In developing the wax sculptures I seem to be getting some interesting sections, which I am developing further. Keeping wax in bucket of cold water is working well, just may need to buy more buckets.  This cold water storage gave me another idea about warming the wax quickly to start with: - put it in hot water for a few seconds.  This seems to work well with the modelling wax, though once the sculptures take on their more delicate aspects don't think it's such a good idea, to re-warm that way.  Also having to take care as if droplets of water are on the wax and get worked into the surface it seems to become less stable.

Further developments hoping to get my hands on some dentists wax to test out its properties.  (Thanks Steve).

As I am forming the sculptures they start to develop by themselves especially sections I am not working on directly.  They are affected by how I hold them, which parts are touching my hands, how warm the room is, the rate at which I am working or the pressure I use, and how warm or cold my hands are.  These factors all influence the movement within the wax.  I like this as some interesting forms have developed and it helps me evolve an initial idea into something more.  Whatever I have been looking at in my research seems to seep into the work too.  Not just at an obvious conscious level, but very much at a sub-conscious level, sometimes elements appear and when I reflect on them I realise it has to do with something I have seen or read weeks earlier, and my brain has obviously digested the information and has evolved it into something new.

To progress the organic less controlled side of the work further (and to have a slightly stronger result, (while still maintaining fragility and unstable                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         end results), I am going to take some firm setting wax, e.g. microcrystalline melt it and then via some container introduce it to cold water.  Hopefully this will set it in some interesting forms, which I can then work on if needed with possibly a small blowlamp kind of thingy!!  (Well I have not bought it yet so I don't know what it's called).

# 5 [12 October 2009]

Melted m. crystalline wax: - Trying to introduce it to a cold bucket of water quickly has proved troublesome and has at times caused what one observer described as the  'poached egg' effect! (Not really what I was going for!)  With tin foil I was able to get the wax into the bucket in a reasonable quantity.  But I could not get the foil away quickly enough and the wax always stuck to the foil.  If I could avoid the foil sticking the small cavernous shapes are quite interesting.  Though another problem is the white wax makes them too reminiscent of what's left of a candle after a long power cut, and not organic form. 

Exploring the more accidental ways of creating wax sculptures: - Had problems with what containers to use, as thin plastic containers melt!  The wax sticks to metal foil.  (Not to mention testing my asbestos hands to the limit!).  Other more robust containers end up with the wax breaking up as it is removed, even after warming them before putting the wax in!  I do like the effects that I see happening though.  I like the many honeycombed crevices (a little like a Therese Oulton painting).  The feathered edges explore the delicacy I enjoy, and the way the water swirls around the solidifying wax causes some interesting surface texture to form on even the smoothest parts.

Finally have managed to get two usable sculptures, one by using part of an old card tea bag box.  Filled it with hot wax then after submersing this in the cold-water bucket, peeled away the card.  Did lose some sections, but was left with a reasonable form.  The other was a section from a 'gone wrong' early piece, which I salvaged.  Both are very different in their shape.  The one being as I have said quite honey combed, the other much smoother and solid.

The candle looking aspect, which I did not like about the white wax, I have tried working on in these 2 accidental sculptures by adding paint.  I do like colour!  But will have to consider further how far to take the colour aspect of the sculptures as I also feel the etiolated look of the more yellow waxes adds it's own ambiguity and unease. 

I have tried to add colour to the harder wax and strength to the soft wax by mixing the soft brown with the hard microcrystalline.  This has not been very successful, varying mixes have not given the results I wanted.  When mixed for the introduction into cold water, the resulting wax is not a good colour, insipid and uninteresting, and also (and more importantly) has no form.  It often remains limp, and large amounts float in the water looking like scum on the top of a pond! 

# 6 [12 October 2009]

I had started to get worried about my works direction and feeling a little flat and uncertain.    Leafing through a natural history book on shells etc. and a lovely Peter Randall-Page book with some lovely images in was helpful.  Then I looked afresh at my found objects, decaying Cactus leaves, broken shells, animal scull, pitted volcanic rock etc., they have so much to offer.  I soon started to cheer up and get the excitement and focus back!

Have seen a great clip of Eleanor Crook making an emaciated man, using wax.  Great to watch how expertly she made a really believable face.   The wax looked lovely and pliable and yet I got the impression it was quite stable enough for when she displays and stores her work.  Would like to discover what wax she is using and give it a try.

Have improved the warming technique for larger quantities of waxes that melt at body temperature.  I just put it in a plastic bag then put that in the hot water, which prevents any water accidentally contaminating the wax, seems obvious now.

I made plans to get advice/ practical help with my photography, as I want to document my sculptures properly.  But as often happens all did not go to plan...  Unfortunately on the allotted day the flu got the better of my advisor.  Hope he is feeling better soon, (but glad he did not stay and give it to me!) 

So, Thought I had better stop being chicken and just have a go myself.  Took longer than I expected to get all the lighting sorted and backdrop etc.  But once I started to take the photos... well, what fun!  Continued to have problems with the backdrop as it liked to crinkle and crease etc.  I had to dash at the end of my photo session to pick up the children.  Thank goodness my camera battery ran out as I was finding it hard to drag myself away!  Every angle, every adjustment in lighting helped inform me about my own work!   It's likely that I have lots of photos that won't be as good as I first think, but I am not too worried as I got so much out of the process.  Taking the photos just seemed to introduce me to my work afresh.  Seeing new angles and interesting plays with the light helped me clarify in my head what was working for me in the sculptures and what needed more thought.  Weight, density, texture, interplay of the forms construction all became a little clearer.

# 7 [12 October 2009]

Always seem to have problems when I get near a computer!  They obviously don't like me much!!  Mind you, mine is so old it should be drawing its pension.  So may be I'm just being ageist!  Eventually managed to get some of the pictures I took on to the blog!  As I suspected there are problems with quite a few mainly regarding focusing, (me being too close to the object for the camera to cope with).  But still liked the images.  The angles on some are great, if a little blurry, so will just have to do those again. 

Some of the sculptures that I was worrying about looking a bit too 'Hammer House Of Horror' have grown on me since photographing them.  But I am still am not sure!  They certainly have a hybridism about them!

# 8 [29 October 2009]

After a recent visit to Yorkshire Sculpture Park to see Peter Randall Pages exhibition I was inspired to research phyllotaxis.  This (very briefly) is the arrangement of cells, organs etc. Within plants which follow a mathematical pattern.  The way leaves grow on plant stems etc. follows a pattern.  It can either be alternate, opposite, whorled or spiral.  I particularly like the phyllotactic patterns made by the seeds of a sunflower head.   It has two oppositely directed spirals, one going clockwise the other anti clockwise; this creates an optical effect of criss-crossing spirals which is fascinating.  (These patterns are not just contained in plants they can be found in many places even in the markings on some seashells).  These phyllotatic patterns also correlate with Fibonacci numbers.  When the spirals are multiple they create whorls and they then have multiples of Fibonacci numbers.  I have been looking out for sunflower to photograph.  I have found one, unfortunately some of the seeds are missing now, but the pattern can still be clearly seen even in this area.  (This is something that I feel I can particularly develop through my print work).

At the same time as developing the sculptures and documenting them photographically, I have been developing drawn records of these forms.  I want these images to suggest the historical conventions used in the documentation of natural history.  I initially started pencil drawings onto clean white paper.   These first drawings are o.k., but I want to give the pictures more importance and a history.

I tried out a few differing ways of presentation then decided to try aging the paper... I was not too convinced about this as I thought the concept a little silly in some ways.  But the thought of what it might be like wouldn't go away so I had a go anyway.  I am quite glad I did now as it has given the drawings another edge of fragility, as the paper itself now looks fragile.  It adds to the images importance and believability as a botanical record.  You handle old documents with more reverence and care than you might I more recently produced document and you seem to care about its reliability/accuracy less, as if accepting it to be the best record possible at the time.

Naming some of the forms I have drawn may be necessary, to recreate the recording conventions used both in the past and today.  I do not want to simply produce a 'made up' name with no reasoning behind it.  It would be good if it had some basis in real botanical recording....  I will need to chase this up.

# 9 [13 November 2009]

I seem to only get a short way in actually creating art work before I am off researching again.  Though the initial point for the research may seem straight forward to satisfied, it always seems to lead on to many more areas of interest or raise more questions requiring even more research!!  It does keep the inspiration levels high, but my rate of production just does not keep pace with my ideas!

This was another research day.

A.M.

Visited larger library checking out loan books, reference books and what they call 'the stack' (which are books that have been taken out of use).  Not at all 'sexy' research I suppose.  I have however found numerous interesting images and lots of useful info.  The 2 most exciting aspects were:

1) A large reference book on mushrooms, with species I have not found previously in other books.2) A smaller book still in the reference section which attempts to explain the meanings behind words used in the naming of plants e.g. Facetus means elegant etc.

I did find lots of other interesting images and snippets of information in many other books available and brought the usual stack home to plough through!

P.M.

Visited the local Museum to look through their Botany section, checking out specimens, but mainly just re looking at their styles of display/image recording and naming protocols.  This was o.k.  In some of the display cabinets they used a second smaller box to contain the specimen.  These specialist boxes looked very much like the boxes I used in an artist book last year, (boxes used in taxonomy of various insects).  So I think I will be re ordering some more, after checking out sizes first!  This visit was of good use, but I may visit a museum with a larger Botanical section, I'll check out Manchester or Liverpool.  As I have interest in representing my objects so they allude to the whole scientific, taxonomic, Museum system of display. During the visit discussed the possibility of opening up the cabinets with a member of staff from the museum.  As I expected I would need to speak with the curator (who was not available).   I will wait before following this up as I need to be very clear about what it is I want as I have other ideas as to my display.  

# 10 [13 November 2009]

Leafing through some of the books I borrowed from the library I was interested to see some mushrooms that look quite waxy.  One looks almost identical to one of my wax sculptures!  I am sure I have not seen the image before!

My immediate feelings are that there seems a lot of useable material, but I can't always be sure of my first impressions.   I need time for the information and images to filter through my brain a few times; for the new information to combine and make connections, for things to link up in my own unique way.  I find that even when I am not sure if there is something directly usable, as long as I found the information/image interesting in some way it all seems to go into storage in my head, where it is adapted, combined, linked in with other stored bits and something new and mine comes out at some later point.