doing. action. verb. l’herbe.

I’m now onto number 28/254 paintings and I have now had a chance to look back on works I have done over a month ago. Some of them I will leave alone and some I will add to as looking at them again I don’t consider them finished.

I have zero funds (I am working to find a solution i.e. a paid position, but till I get that I have no budget for art materials, though I am getting fitted light in my shed soon) and I do have paint, but am running very low on some colours. So I am having to use them more sparingly.

I started the 254 paintings wanting to stick to using canvas and I would prefer this but I have now nearly run out ( I have a little more left), so I am working over old works on paper and wood too. And on the look out for material to paint on. As I was back in April. Same pursuit, different title now maybe seeking 214 (have 40 already, 28 underway) surfaces to paint on.

I’m now on painting 28/254 and looking at my paintings, though with each one I am thinking about a word to begin with and then on and off through the painting process, It isn’t at all clear that the work’s starting point is a word.
What I find myself doing through the process is concentrating on the surface, the marks of the previous painting, the contours of current or previous gestures in paint.

This week my painting routine has also involved a warm up piece which I add to each day, usually just one element is added each time. An ice breaker, I find I do need this. My art practice thrives on momentum and this is so regularly lost with other tasks I must do (am keeping them to the barest minimum!) Then there is the choosing of canvas/paper/whatever surface I can get hold of to paint on. Picking the word out of the bag, looking up its meaning and painting.

So – in this I am beginning to analyse what I actually do and what I think I am doing / what I had intended to do and figure out what the difference is! I really hard for me to spot.

I had been intending that the whole painting was responding to the word I get, but I am increasingly responding to whats gone before on the surface. So does what I am doing have anything to do with the words? I think it has a slight, a very tenuous link to the words, but sometimes I think it has no link, the surface I am working on can dominate from the very start.

I am currently looking at the work of Christopher Wool.

Due to lack of material to paint on might do another call out for surfaces to paint on and be on the look out for material up for grabs.

I am interested to see what would change if I took some of what I’ve painted over the past 2years (the most intriguing) and see what they might be like as murals / huge.. But work a bit like Paul Westcombe does on walls, a motif in mind but nothing complete. In my painting I often follow contours of the paint and many other tendencies, things that I repeatedly do but have been trying to stop as it feels like I’m using them as comfortable things to do and I don’t trust using them. What if I didn’t repress these?

Something I am doing more of with the paintings I’m doing now is making minor changes as stepping back more often. A bit slower, a little bit delicate.

So, while the painting goes on, like my heartbeat, other things are also developing. I am working on something that feels complicated bringing many other people into, but at its core is very simple. I’m turning text into movement. As Marie-Pierre Leroux (Artist) put it when I was talking it all through earlier this week – “I am asking text to walk out as a dancer.” I have been talking to many people about this, some who’ll be involved and so far Abergavenny library and Dance Blast (also in Abergavenny). This project is putting me quite on the edge, it is stretching what I have done with text to its limit. I am in new territory and am looking for videos and articles/books to find out more about experimental dance, other artist pushing text into new forms and anything else that could be useful.

Settling into quite a routine now. The grids and lines have fallen by the wayside in the last few days, at least for now.  I was feeling that I couldn’t get into the word (enough) that is my starting point by working in a grid or with lines. It didn’t quite do.  With an expanse of canvas I am hoping I am more able to gently hone in on formal qualities emerging by having a word in mind.    On the 14th the word was allo- meaning other, different.  I brought out the contrasts in the previous painted form by making areas either white or black as a way to kick off.

Haven’t got much canvas left (what i have got will only last me two weeks, tops.  I would like to have stretched canvas’ ready to use, a few weeks worth at all times would be great.  I am mainly trying to set myself up so that while I am painting, all that I am thinking of is the painting, not where the next canvas is coming from.  I am also attempting not to overthink while I am painting, to follow my nose.  Paint is also running low and the budget is tight, have been doing temporary jobs while looking for part time role, they are like gold dust!

Today I am on 20/254 painting the word Aaronic  – pertaining to Aaron, the first Jewish high priest; Levitical…. Levitical – (have just taken a part of the definition on)- pertaining to ritual . I got the emulsion (primed it this time, though worked into it wet) going onto the canvas as soon as I’d picked the word out of the bag, looked up definition and straight it. It is a battle for me not to internally question every move I make on canvas, so I have to act once the word is in my head, but  before I start coming up with reasons not to do this or that.  Just do it – remembering I can at any point scrape the paint off and start again.

With this huge number of words to paint, I was initially considering ‘sharing’ it on social media.  I felt, before I started, that I needed the motivation that would give me, but now I’ve started I don’t actually need it. I have stubbornness by the bucketload, so don’t feel motivation is a problem. I am intending to show some of the works in my front window again (did this in the early summer months) as I have people staring into my front room anyway!  It feels low-key, low-fi and it’s free.  I was going to publicize all the ones which passed my ‘1 month put away test’ on Twitter, Instagram, facebook (would have set up a facebook artist page), but then started thinking about the time this would waste, and that I don’t want to self-promote, at least not in this way. [since initially writing this I have linked to this blog post and image – it felt relevant in the conversation on twitter – this is all getting a bit meta!] I feel that I don’t really get social media.  I reckon, for it to work, I would need to interact far more than I am prepared to (time). But, also, I am so interested in what other people are doing sometimes that I need to catch myself and stop life passing me by while I’m sucked into a screen.  I need to check I’m doing what I must so often while online.  I don’t think I’m alone in this.  The internet ever-presence is a huge danger to my own practice, it feels incredibly freeing to know i will be offline for certain set periods, except on rare occasions.

The screen being a massive source of text and imagery, but its use is so limited, the 2D video experience is great, but just going to my local theatre at the weekend with my son and friends to see I believe in unicorns with Danyah Miller bringing the story to life – the set being piles of books and ladders, the books opened up to provide props.  The imagination that is tapped and reached with low-fi equipment (though, there were hand held projectors, great sound and lighting) in a way that is impossible with something on a screen.  More is left to the individual in the audience.  Of course I loved this with its story of Libricide and themes on a love of books.  I’m considering the transformation of the play in the minds of the audience.  How am I transforming the words in my painting of them?  Am I even transforming the word – no, I’m painting my response, it is not what I see when I think of the word, its initiated by the gestures I make when thinking of the word, the colours I choose, the textures I make and the forms I mould on the canvas.  But then, in  eyes of viewers of my work, what then might they see, knowing the word and seeing the painting?  Would they see any link between the title and painting, or none at all? And does this matter?

Initially the plan with 254 paintings was to paint one a day, every day, even if I only had 30 minutes to paint.  Now the plan is I have the morning/afternoon/all day then I paint (evening is still currently out due to no light in studio and wanting a clear boundary between my physical art making space and home.). If painting in morning ( I am trying to clear my diary to keep mornings free as its my best time) then I get out there at latest by 8.45 and paint until 1pm (on painting days the rule is no checking internet til 1pm. Husband commented today, why dont you leave it a while to warm up out there? As I can get out there I cannot delay, not quite sure how I’ll cope through the winter, I am hoping I can get a light soon so I am able to shut the shed and warm int with fan heater ( have got but can’t use much as in the day if I shut the door its quite murky in there!

Routines, routines!

Now on day 11 and some days the painting seems to do something right away, others not at all. These paintings which are not successful I continue working on when I feel the current days work is as far as it can go or drying.  In the first week I used oils a bit, but am not going to from now as space to dry these isn’t available.

Below are my self-set and evolving rules:

254 Paintings

•           How it started

Having the notion of Bathe in ignorance on my mind, I responded to it by wanting to test my own ignorance in a specific way.  Turning to the Oxford Shorter dictionary I decided I would see how many words I don’t know on a limited number of pages.  Being interested in growth patterns and maths, I chose the Fibonacci sequence of numbers to dictate the pages I then photocopied (the largest dictionary I could find in my area is in Abergavenny library) pages 1, 2, 3, 5,           ,8, 13, 21, 34, 55, 89,  144, 233, 377, 610, 987, 1597 and 2584.  I then had 254 unknown words to work with, which I first responded by building a tent structure with some of the words pricked out with a pin, allowing the sunlight to stream through the holes and bathe myself with the light of the words I am ignorant of.

•           Intention at beginning was to do a painting a day, with a word drawn from a hat as the starting point.  I trialled this with Abjure and Lingonberry in July 2015.

Initially I wanted to simply respond to the word in paint – Lingonberry is written clearly on canvas and Abjure originally had its definition in pencil into the paint.

•           My evolving & current routine:

STUDIO DAYS:

Be in shed by 845am at the latest.

Not allowed to be on the internet until 1pm.

1)         Pick canvas (currently painting over old ones and trying to source old canvas sails – it just feels right).  Am intending canvas’ to be ready stretched before I start.

2)         Pick a word out of the bag.

3)         Look up the meaning and write in concise form in journal.

4)         If the word has an even number of letters then I divide the canvas up into a grid with number of squares /rectangles equal to the number of letters in that word.

If the word has an odd number of letters then I’ll divide the canvas into bands equalling that number.

5)         Paint!

The grid structure has been appearing in my spontaneous painting recently and I have also deliberately used it as the starting point of paintings this year.

Lines / bands is something that appeals to me with its obvious link to text and writing.

NON-STUDIO DAYS

Kit: Sketchbook, 2B pencil, rubber, sharpener, reference pictures for back up (but mostly want to be drawing plants / growth from life).

Sustained drawing of growth.  Growing foliage often appears in my work, I am not sure why and so I am going to pursue this by making studies and observation.  I intend to print these through a method where I can use the photo to print from & in black and white i.e. screen print, gravure.  Currently researching printing processes which could be suitable.

I will be adding some photos of my paintings here, on Instagram, my a-n blog, Facebook page and the real thing will be visible from my window in Abergavenny.  I am really interested in the possibilities of the single painting gallery.

***

I’m attaching images of some of the paintings – I have a list of things I need for this project and finding & funding a tripod is one of them, not to mention canvas and paint!

It’s now 5 days since The Print Shed show finished (Sunday 20th).  It was an incredible chance to show my work and surround visitors entirely with my work.  For visitors to understand what I’m up to I did need to give an explanation and I felt that visitors who came on the few occasions I wasn’t about, came away without clicking at all with it.  Many people who I spoke to were really engaging with the issues in my work. I am mulling over whether there is a problem with me having to explain for understanding. Is it necessary?    I would like to know what people who just look at my work might see / perceive. This show was a fantastic way to have a first solo show. I had the run of the garden plus a whole marquee to fill. There were other artists around (stewarding and visiting) every day of the show. Valuable feedback from fellow artists, and there were many artists visiting! As well as the times when I engaged the people who were just there as ‘chauffeurs’ ( and there were a lot of them!), people whose eyes lit up on the mention of Fibonnacci or of Ignorance or sheer weight of information we have available to us now.  One guy even gave me a lesson in Alphanumerics (check term!)

I think when I have my next solo show, I hope I’ll have a more consistent appearance of the work, i.e. All on stretched canvas and one series, rather than several on show at once. (It did seem to go -all involving text somehow).  Also to be more happier about the possibility of selling a painting ( it’s not a crime, after all!). I sold cards of my work (not of art that were on sale, but of the writing on roses, grass, daisy etc) and sold one medium painting.

This time last year I’d been busy organising the Framework Open exhibition in h.Art and then carrying on with the preparations for paperfields group show in London, which was epic for me.  Organising 2shows in consecutive months is not to be recommended. I got steeped in admin and tasks, not good for my own practice.

This autumn I have set myself up to paint the 254 words which I came up with from the notion of to Bathe in ignorance (the 3D piece is on the back burner, and needing some tlc) and decided to look at my own ignorance of words by looking at The Oxford Shorter dictionary (the largest dictionary I could get hold of in my local library), narrowing down the number pages to look at from thousands, to a manageable 17. I then photocopied those pages and highlighted the words i didn’t know.  The result is a set of 254 words,  I displayed a telepromter video projected onto a blank canvas with my hesitant (recorded) voice reading them out aloud in the marquee.  Photos attached of the show and I did a 3 min video of it (low quality, but you get the feel of it)    https://vimeo.com/140422911

Some of the se word spilled out of the marquee and into the garden on the grass (see pics).  This is me taking the thought of people being born with the privilege and right to read and write and others being born without(people who live more physically) that privilege a little further and imagining the physical world and the textual world together and the physical world speaking / writing, but in a language we can’t understand.

So, I am quietly starting (before I scare myself and talk myself out of it) to do 254 paintings in 254 days with 254 words.  The routine is to get out in my shed at the earliest opportunity each day (still needing electric light out there!), pick the canvas, pick a word (all 254 were printed out, cut out and put in a bag, hanging in the shed), write word and date on reverse and then paint. This first week I have simply used the word alone to respond to, next week I’ll look up the meaning each day too.  I am working on a mixture of previously painted on canvas and new canvas (not got any yet).  I am trying to find out if I can get my hands on old sail canvas, with the wear of use already in it.

On day 4 today and I have found I am responding more to the surface than to the word that is intended as my starting point. I am not too concerned with this, as right from coming up with this epic paint run, I am clear with myself that what I really need from this is a kick up the rear end!  Last year, my balance between planning and spontenaity was way out, when working spontaneously I had no limits (i felt) and my planning generally took the form of being overwhelmed by admin. Plus doing admin seems to create more. Plus the fact that if you are seen as efficient at it you get given more!  Currently I am leaving any admin/internet/bitty tasks till after lunch.

I am feeling more positive and energised than I have for a long time, it also helps seeing the continued progress of older artists, Rose Wylie is utterly compelling, quietly confident and has a dress sense I can understand (I am an avoider of shopping, or Shoppi in the local tongue).

After a solid week of setting up, I was ready (with assistance!) just as our opening evening party got started last night!

The space I had – the marquee – although I’d known the measurements was much larger than I’d anticipated.  Good job I have a lot of work to fill it!  I have work filling the marquee and spilling out into the large garden – writing in the grass, on the flowers, stones, hedges and trees.  I’d even left my watercolours and brushes out from Monday’s busy intervention in the garden.  The gardener will be coming across writing in the leaves all autumn!

Because I’d got hung up on the idea of a Bathe in Ignorance installation in the form of a dome and the reality being I couldn’t get it to look sleek from the outside on my limited budget.  This is one for funding, except I need to develop the work on and it stalled at the initial idea stage and hit a wall when I discovered my tipi worked, yet no finance to fund its development (was working on a funding application before the summer holidays.

I am also swearing to myself never to open a show in September, until my son is older, the run up to a show over the 6 week school holidays just doesn’t work and I want to be focussed on family and friends (plus any spare time I want to be painting and drawing, not stressing over organising).

I am very glad of the practical help I have had from family, from Jill Barneby at The Print Shed, from my tutor Allison Neal for a good talk through when I really needed it, Kate Morgan-Clare for her ear and advice, Viv and Ant Barraclough for loan of equipment and an Andy and Trevor for loan and help erecting scout tent that is more like a marquee and display boards.

This just goes to show, you can’t easily show without the support people around and I now owe many a favour to replenish my favour bank!