Finding an identity as a solo artist, among other things. R&D project 08-09. Esc

Well, another packed week- I'm multi tasking and simultaniously collaborating, all good, my heads rather full though, but rather it was full with this than anything else.

Last weekend I met to work with ben, as ben and Holly- the first time for two years. There's was a lot of aprehension and I struggled to talk first thing, It felt very precious for a while there, but we had a productive two days together. We are working specifically on a commissioned work for EEC platform at Queen Mary university on the 5th June. They have asked 10 artist from the past 10 years to return to the festival and present work. We are planning a performance that reworks two elements from our past work. We ended the weekend with three elements though, the live video link sitting opposite each other but not really opposite/virtually opposite, used in table for two in Edinburgh, past objects, DIY objects and stuff purchased together over the past 6 years and our journal from the Edinburgh fringe.

Meeting up again felt very good, it also felt very exhausting, we have a history, and a lot of evidence of this history. Lots of memorys and stories filled the weekend, but fundamentally we still had a conection, a shared interest in materials and human relationships, and a desire to continue to expose our own relationship to visualise this.

What came from the weekend was an understanding not felt previously and a sense of calm. Having both collaborated with a number of other artists seperately over the past 2 years has allowed us to see that feelings/frustrations etc… are not always specific to us as individuals- not personal, more of the experiences anyone goes through, more attached to the act of collaborating and making work rather than who it is with.

We also left the weekend with ideas, several in fact, one in particular is to re-visit and re-stage past work/ past images/photographs. We agreed on two a year.

Here is some documentation form the weekend.

We have met and it went well- what we found in Sandon WAS interesting. I am now working in the village hall, it’s a new base for me and I’m collecting video footage, connecting with local businesses (Saddle menders and model aeroplane makers) and working with postage drawings (posting envelopes with chalks back to Sandon from Hertford and from Hertford to Sandon). I hope to then develop these 'accidental' drawings into performative actions/ movements. The day with Richard has allowed me to see how important I value drawing and how it has made up a large part on my practice. It has also given me much confidence in my ability to make/create/explore site and materials. Having Richard there also allowed me to see the village I was so familiar with objectively. I have now given myself permission to use it and can see how to use it.

During the day we also explored my own stories and verbally, creating a kind of video interview if you like. Initially I thought I would find this difficult but actually I can easier than I expected. Another possibility would be to develop these into a monologue of sorts.

So, in short the ideas that have came out of this day are

1. Video interview/documentary/relaying stories about Sandon-the village and the activity in it- from memories and from knowledge of how it is now.

2. Drawing work- postage drawings.

3. Sculptural work- crap semi mechanistic sculptures that would work easier if there were two people but that have been adjusted so that they work with one person.

4. Telephone box (more later) and guerrilla performances.

5. Posters containing rules found around the village (My Mums posters, she always uses that font).

6. Event late summer for villagers sharing my practice.

7. Aeroplane performance (possible learning to fly a model aeroplane around my parents 3 bed semi detached house.