University Campus Suffolk

The hanging is finished!! It looks exactly how I envisioned it and more. When you eneter the space everywhere you look around there is something to look at so there’s an intimate feeling when you are inside. Curating the space was very quick and easy everything in its place suited perfectly. There’s the main piece of my large self portrait which is 152 x 101cm is facing directly opposite the ‘Falling Into the Abyss poainting showing similar styles so they mirror well together. Then to the left of the space is the portrait of my friend Leyla showing a dark emotion with her hand on her head, and opposite that is the painting of my friend Tori which shows a happy emotion with her hand together. They also mirror well from each other as the show directly the opposite emotion that you get contrast with, and the hand gestures are different. Finally the biggest is the self portrait with the video which is a big part of the whole project. Opposite that is the diary I created to document anything that’s happened within the last 31 Days. Overall I’m really happy with how the space looks and don’t think I could make it better.

I’ve finished my big self-portrait and also the black and white painting of my friend Leyla. Here’s some zoomed in sections of each painting, not showing to much don’t won’t give anything away. Just need to finish my last painting and a bit more in my sketchbook then hopefully I have finished.

Alot has happened since I done my latest post!!

I got the three canvases for the paintings that will be the main focus for the show. I got two canvses that are 120 x 80cm and the biggest one which is 152.3cm x 101cm. I have documented my emotions on painting the pieces and life in general into a diary and I am going to include this into the show somehow. The idea was to have the diary locked away in a clear box onto a plinth so it stands a big part of the show. Alot has been going in and outside of uni that has been affecting my practice so I have documented all of this just to get all of it on to paper and see how my paintings turn out.

My vision as it stands is when you enter the boxed in space in the front will be the main portrait of myself which will fit the whole length of the wall. Have a projection of my textured self portrait with sound to the right hand side. However at this point as I have never worked with projectors before, I am hoping that the light beams from the projector will not interfere with the paintings, so the composition of the space may have to change. I am set on having a video in the show, as the music and the texture of the paint bring a huge importance to my emotions and other things.

With the music element of the show, I have struggled to find time to create my own composition. But I have started to think about the music I play when painting and what I like to listen to. I am now creating my own composition but using elements of pieces that represent me and the emotion I am trying to depict in the video. Originally the project was to capture other people’s emotion but now it has become a much more personal project. When the viewer enters the space with the video playing using sound, the diary and the paintings themselves, I want them to feel like they have entered my brain in a way.

So far I have a diary, the main potrait of me and the video sorted, I have almost finished a portrait of my friend Leyla and the same with a portrait of my friend Tori both depicting different emotions. In my previous blog posts I have mentioned about the portrait of Anna showing a happy emotion, to my textured self-portrait showing sadness and I really liked the contrast between them. The space I have is quite a big boxed room but with the scale of the paintings I have done, it is going to feel quite cramped I reckon, which is what I want. I will post close up sections of the paintings i have done, but I don’t want much to be given away as I want it all to be a surprise.

What’s next?

I am going to figure out where the projection should go in the space, with out interfering with the paintings. If I can’t find a clear display box, I will try to find some way else compositionally to lock away the diary. With the diary at the early stages of writing I felt that the audience should read it to get an idea of what my project is about, but now it has become very personal and private I’m not sure at this stage what to do. Tracey Emin’s pieces using writing like in her Applique blankets and neons are very powerful pieces when enter the space. Such as the tent piece ‘Everyone I Have Ever Slept With’ is a great example when entering the space you are in an intimate environment with all these names and message filled to the brim in the tent. Hoever with mine I don’t think showcasing sections of my diary would make a difference in its strength as I think with it locked away makes it equally as powerful.

Yesterday was a busy day, sorting out spaces to place our final degree show, which is just over a month’s time. We discussed spaces that would be available to be used, and listed my name in a couple. just incase I don’t get the space I would prefer. I thought of some interesting ideas of what I can put into the to be confirmed spaces and I am now even more excited to see how my vision will appear. If I get a boxed room I would have a six-foot landscape portrait of myself, which will be the focal point of when you enter the space. I’m not going to give away anything at this stage but I have a clear vision of how I imagine my space to turn out. To the left of the space I am envisioning a portrait of someone who is raging with anger, someone shouting and almost to the point they’re almost pulling their hair out. Facing that portrait to the right would be a portrait of someone who beaming with happiness and laughter. When you enter the space I felt the massive scale canvases in a smallish space would fit well with what I want to achieve with the intimacy of the viewer and the powerful emotions that I’m trying to capture. With three pieces as the main focus, I am now thinking that I will add the video I created of my textured self-portrait to the left indent on the wall where there’s dark shadow, so fitting a projection would be perfect. (Which would then mean there would be elements of sound added) Planning that space out has made me finalise what I exactly would like in the degree show. If I don’t get that space I will find ways around it.

With the three new paintings that will be done, I have now thought of a new way of documenting the process. With my project developing my work is now based on my emotions whilst painting a portrait, and seeing how the paint and colours I use communicates. From the 5^th May I am painting each piece 7 days each until the degree show hanging. Each day I am going to write in a sketchbook of how I am feeling that day, (keeping it like a diary) do a little sketch of anything that comes to mind and then add a take a photograph of myself each day that shows what mood I was in when I was painting. Depending on what space I get I will then decide whether I may add the sketchbook to the degree for the public to see, or create another video of the photographs of myself to show my mood toward the degree show and knowing it’s going to be all over.

Where am I?

Looking back at my blog I feel my ideas have changed quite abit as the posts keep coming. I started off painting portraits that are one tonal and detecting an emotion that may seem obvious what it is. ‘Invidia’ was my first painting and that started off something that I knew could be develped into something bigger. Looking through my dissertation again helped me develop the idea of using sound in my work. I knew I wanted to use sound in my work because that is the other big part of me, so this project has developed into my journey of my final year at university.

I have thought more about different ways of painting not just painting exactly like a photograph, but painting in a way that I actually now enjoy. Texture was something I was not overally interested in, in my work, but after people complimented it I feel differently. I still am a perfectionist to get proportions right I feel as this year has developed I have learnt not to be fussy outlining, but just paint directly onto the canvas. I did wonder whether painting like that would affect the proportions, but working free-hand it has developed alot more. I can see whats wrong alot more easier, and can resolve problems quicker.

After the first crit review I had on my work, it was big learning curve for my project. I need to paint what ever mood I’m in. After that point was made, I have done more experimentations on media, portrait styles (blurred portraits) and working with video and installation ideas.

What’s happening at the moment?

I am currently painting a portrait of my friend Emily, using a variety muddy fleshy tones. I am hoping to achieve a really dark frightening painting that has that dark element like in Boltanski’s work.

What’s next? I am going to paint three large canvases that show strong emotion, showing a lot of painting technique and hopefully create a soundtrack that fits well with the paintings. I need to think of alternatives if I don’t get the space I want. The main part that I will talk about in the blog next, is whether sound is going to work or not?