I did something I have been meaning to do for a while now and that is to check out the ex-pat scene, as I have avoided it up till now. I had the idea that it would reveal something about Westerners engaging with China. I headed to the rich side of town and walked around till I found a nestle of Western style bars full of ex-pats getting drunk on a Saturday night in Xiamen. Surveying the tables on the street and peering inside my heart sank as, in truth, I was also looking for a place to have a quiet beer. They seemed one more disappointing than the next. I found it difficult to imagine myself in any so, circling around, I made my way back and at the last I noticed they had a small screen outside showing the cricket. Pausing to look at the score one of the bargirls brushed past and said cheerily “come inside we have a big screen to watch it on.” I followed. It was a dive of a sports bar with a pool table and perhaps 10 to 15 people inside, mostly older Western men and a few younger Chinese women, most of whom were staff. I got talking to a Scot at the bar who introduced himself as Callum.
Callum was three days into a drinking binge precipitated from loosing his job as a sales manager in Xiamen. He was pouring Jack Damiels direct from the bottle, his bottle I suppose, which stood upon the bar. Between some texting and petty attention given to Cindy a Chinese woman who looked profoundly bored and probably hired, he held forth on the Chinese, who he “actually liked”, Hong Kong police who he did not and he must have asked at least 20 times “are you gay?” He could not believe I wasn’t. I tried explaining that it made no difference to me what people are and that him calling me gay was like being called a Scorpio when you are Pisces. That, he judged, was a very gay answer. He then enlisted help from his drinking buddy Ragi an Icelander in his late 20s. He joined in the gay/not gay debate and was of the same opinion as Callum. They would then change the topic only to 5 minutes later return to the burning question “so are you gay really?”
I also got talking also to the bargirl who asked what I was doing in Xiamen. She spoke good English but when I said the word ‘artist’ she did not understand as it was not in her vocabulary. It wouldn’t be a word that was often needed working here. Finally, I witnessed the most pathetic game of pool I think I have even seen. Jim a 50something Englishman of few words was playing one of the bargirls. Jim was truly terrible at pool, an embarrassment to watch. Ragi had a word in the bargirl’s ear however and advised her to let Jim win. She did her level best to let him win and her strategy was so obvious that there was not even any attempt at pretence. Despite this, the game still went to the black as she unintentionally potted balls.
All in all it was more backward that a backward red neck bar in the UK. It was a living breathing caricature. I don’t think I have had the persistent ‘are you gay?’ routine since I was in my early 20s. I thought the world had moved on but this placed seemed to be stuck in time. I also have to consider that these guys are far more typical examples of Westerners than I probably am. These were the types of guys that probably define what a Westerner in China is to Chinese people. I’m afraid that if that is true it is not such a flattering picture and I have heard it said that there is a sentiment held by some here that the Westerners in China are the unsuccessful ones who could not succeed back home. Callum did nothing to dispel this notion I’m afraid and, if you are reading this Callum, I repeat I AM NOT GAY.
