I have to admit to feeling rather disillusioned lately. The problem comes from an incongruence between my intellectual and emotional response to the world as a whole.
I’ve started my first residency and have been feeling rather isolated. I have to lock the door for my own safety as I am working alone, but can view the world as it passes me by. They can also view me in a thoroughly de-personalised voyeuristic manner. I sometimes feel like I’m in a goldfish bowl. Coupled with the events of a month ago which has drastically altered my perspective on the world it may not be a good place for me to be emotionally. Something I need to work through and try to not despise or feel threatened by the general public, or I will end up buying into our culture of institutionalised fear.
On a positive note, I have made a start on 3 forms today, inspired by hearing how Barbara Hepworth worked, I have taken my 2D drawings and turned them around, abstracted them, and made them 3D, I will go back tomorrow and start working with the plaster to improve their raw state. I also want to explore how they relate to each other, and how they sit aesthetically in that relationship. I would also like to experiment with some of the sounds around the park. The lyrical meditative devotions of a local resident, sat, cross legged, atop a grassy hillock, was almost paganistic and has inspired me to experiment with recording. The recordings would then relate to each form, as a small environment of their own. A worship of Art through music.
