I feel like I’m getting nearer to where I want to be in terms of art career development, but further from being the artist I want to be. Things are happening, people are interested in my work, and thats very very good. Yet I am so busy doing all the things that support this progress, that I’ve lost any strong sense (or experience) of my practice. I feel a bit exposed as a result.
Always organising, no open imaginative space. I have to remind myself that this is a phase it will change. Once upon a time I only needed to apply mind over matter mantras due to a bad hangover comedown – ‘this will not last for ever, it’s just the drugs, this will not last for ever its just the…’ Back in the good old days! Now the odd hangover is quite a pleasurable release from thinking and working!
I can’t believe that back in the summer I was looking forward to lots of studio time once my kids went back to school! I should know by now, September means tons of Creative Agent work, tons of childrens activities for my kids, tons of catching up with book-keeping, applying for things in an attempt to combat imminent poverty after a long summer and general stressiness. To top it all my washer broke. I’m trying to think of that as a release from washing duties.
I just hope things move on soon! I’m taking part in a critical discussion ‘Stock Exchange’ in November and feel I would dry up if I had to do that now.
