Today, I realised I can’t do this. I can’t sit in a unit with people staring at me! I’m not a performer – full stop.
I got there just after 2pm today and the only reason I stayed till 3.30, was because my friend turned up and we were chatting for an hour. He kept saying’ oh God – this is awful’ – looking at the rows of faces pressed up to the glass. YES – it was awful! I didn’t like it, I don’t have to be there -so why was I doing it? Why do I feel like I should be offering a service ?
At 3.30, I went out and locked the door behind me, vowing not to go back. I should be happy, as it’s such a stark contrast to when I was invigilating up at the Bridewell last month, and we actually celebrated when more than 3 people came in! An empty shop unit is a whole different ball game.
I headed to town and went to see some of the Biennial.
I did quite well really, taking in the Cunard building, Bluecoat, 28 – 32 Wood st, The Tea Factory, FACT and the Monro. I took in so much art, I suddenly felt that my show was really insignificant.
Oh dear. Maybe it’s just the Christmas blues creeping up on me : (
Tomorrow, I’m staying at home.
