Project Me

It’s not that I don’t have a lot on – I do – it’s that somehow for some reason things don’t feel so burdensome. It crosses my mind momentarily that perhaps they should!

It was good fun to go around the commercial Market Art Fair. It was a beautiful spring day, work were paying my travel expenses, my work-sponsored membership of the International Council of Museums took care of the entrance fee, and I am able to claim back the time from my working week … with all of that in place how could the trip not be (a) jolly. It was also very nice to run in to two Supermarket volunteers working at Market (I wonder if they got paid there). And a nice young curator who I met when she was working at a gallery in Stockholm was there with a gallery from Oslo – I hadn’t ever thought about how galleries might temporarily employ ’local’ assistants rather than having to cover the costs of bringing their staff with them.
So I was looking at things with at least two hats on: as an arts professional looking for trends and potential purchases for the region’s collection, and as an artist seeing what my commercial colleagues are up to. There was not a lot that jumped out as immediately appropriate for the kinds of environments where the region has art – if you exclude their own offices. Much of the figurative imagery included bodies that could too easily be too challenging encountered in a hospital waiting room, and the more abstract pieces tended towards to either dirty muddy tones or a palette reminiscent of the 70s. There were of course some spectacular works that would be great in gleaming modern corporate headquarters.
The artist me felt that I could produce equivalent work if I was a full-time studio artist … but I’m not … so I don’t … and that was a bit tender, but no more than a bit. There’s no point in getting too caught up in wishing that I had had other opportunities or that I had had a different attitude when I was younger.

After a good few hours there and listening to two panel discussions – one interesting one about collecting, and one rather less focussed one about the up surge of textile in contemporary practice, I really could not tell if the majority of the panel were struggling with English or just struggling – and treating myself to good lunch, I made my way to the north of the city to go an event at an artist-run studios and gallery. On my way it struck me that there are broadly two types of artists: project based artists, and product based artists – the two Stockholm fairs, Supermarket and Market reflect the distinct though not necessarily exclusive ways of being. Perhaps I have not been particularly successful at either because I have never really committed to either.

I wonder if my feelings about the work at Market (held at Liljevalchs) might be affected by having shown in the same rooms in Spring Exhibition.  I will admit to being particularly interested to see what was hanging on ‘my wall’ …

Saturday morning and I am at the studio … I haven’t been here enough recently so am taking the opportunity to be here today. I need to be here … ’need’ at an emotional level … this is both where I feel the most me and where I work out (literally) who I am. I feel out of sorts when I am away from the the studio for too long … I lose my sense of self … or at the very least that sense lessens and becomes misty … unclear.

The studio is not an entirely easy place to be. It makes demands on me. It requires me to confront things about myself … things that seem to be becoming more urgent … it requires me to be who I am … or rather to work out who I am. Perhaps that’s it – the studio is a place for working out. Working out in an artistic sense, just as the gym is a place for working out in a physical sense. Studio as a place for exercises and training … for becoming.

This time last week I was on my way in to Stockholm to collect my tie-drapes – which were packed away by the technicians at Liljevalchs after the Spring Exhibition closed, they are in their boxes behind me in the studio. I also picked up A’s unsold painting and delivered it to her gallery (her other two works in the show sold) – I am going to ask her how she came to be working with the gallery. I had a brief and nice chat with the gallery owner/director. He admitted to not having made it to the exhibition. I guess that he wasn’t the only gallerist who didn’t go. He asked if I had seen the show, I am pleased that I, without thinking, answered that I was in it which lead him to ask who I am. Luckily I had picked up an extra copy of the catalogue so I was able to show him my entry in it – which coincidentally is on the same page as A’s (she is Mas… , I am May…). It wasn’t much but it was something … it as me letting someone in the commercial art world know that I exist.

After that I made my way to an opening at another gallery. I had been told about the opening by an artist friend who I met at Supermarket. She is represented by the gallery and I had forgotten that she mentioned this to me some time ago. I recently saw a selection of her work on the gallery’s website when I was looking up information about an artist whose work is in Region Uppsala’s collection. It turns out that the gallery represents two artists whose work has (relatively) recently been bought by the region. Unfortunately my artist friend was invigilating at an artist-run gallery on the other side of town last Saturday so we were unable to meet. My friend has been campaigning for the gallery to get in touch with me … but they have not done so … turning up at their opening was a convenient way to meet them. The long conversation with both my friend’s friend who is the gallery director’s mother and the gallery director herself ended the way all other conversations with commercial galleries have ended – we like you, we like your work, but we can’t sell it so we can’t work with you.  They made polite noises about possible future performance / installation opportunities though these were very vague. I understand their (economic) need to work with artists whose works they can sell, however I also think that a good gallerist is someone who sells work that they believe in rather than simply, and lazily, taking on artists whose work is easy to sell . If I am going to work with, have a relationship with, a commercial gallery it has got to be a gallery who are passionate about what I do and who are passionate about promoting artists that they believe in … not just those where they see an easy sale. Even if they were interested in me I am not sure that I am so interested in them! I didn’t get the impression that they know how to generate excitement and buzz around their artists. I didn’t get the impression that they want to make a big splash in the art scene. I didn’t get the impression that they could convince anyone that their artists are among the most interesting, relevant, and necessary, artists working in Sweden today. What I did get was a much clearer idea about the kind of gallerist that I would like to work with – someone charismatic, passionate, and enthusiastic, someone daring, brave, and adventurous, someone just a little bit crazy!

Supermarket day 0

It was lovely to catch-up with even more friends and colleagues yesterday as the fair really kicked off with the Forum (professional networking event) which was immediately followed by the vip and the preview evening. Over the years I have come to accept the slightly shambolic nature of Supermarket openings … the very unscripted and unrehearsed opening remarks of the directors, the confusion over the Forum programme, the odd period where it’s unclear if people are able to get a drink or not. It always ends well with the buzz of excited conversations, happy reunions, and new encounters.

During the day I had borrowed some additional chairs from a local charity shop and I am really pleased to have created a very different feeling Meeting Room – it will be interesting to see if people show any preference.

As always I am nervous about the Meetings programme and really hope that hosts get something out of it … it’s the hosts that I am most concerned about – they give a lot and I want them to get something back. So far the lowest registrations are for Pam and my meetings. I am not bothered if my meeting is cancelled but I would really bad if Pam’s has very few participants – I know that she has put a lot of thought and preparation in to it. There is still time to drum up interest … so that is what Johanna (the Meetings volunteer) and I will be doing.

I had an email reminding me to reply to a question as to whether I was interested in taking part in the new iteration of the Verdandi student association spring show – this is the event where, in 1907, Eugène Jansson showed his ’naked athletes’ for the first time. It feels like it is an opportunity that I simple can not miss. I have suggested that I can make a short presentation about my Eugène in Uppsala project and /or exhibit something. Meeting the contemporary Verdandi group and being a part of their spring show has to be a part of my project!

Supermarket days -2 and -1

As soon as I arrive at this apartment time begins to collapse and it is as if Supermarket 2023 was yesterday. Arriving at the venue on Monday morning, greeting my colleagues, seeing the logo, feeling the fair starting to take shape only serves to amplify the sense of familiarity … we talk about the Supermarket family … and after fourteen years of involvement I am definitely a part of the family.

Supermarket has become the most familiar thing that I do … and I guess in the way of families it is always the same and always different … it is a living and evolving thing … and I love it – I love being a part of it.

My fourth year as Meetings coordinator and I am finding my stride, there’s still an underlying sense of being a fraud … and that will probably always be there … I just pay it less attention and get on things. So the rooms are almost set-up, one with the usual anonymous ’event hire’ plastic table and chairs, and one – new for 2024! – with sofa and chairs borrowed from a local charity shop. This cosy room is very much inspired by my trip to the Juxtapose fair in Aarhus. Yesterday afternoon I saw that the room was occupied but a group of exhibitors. I wondered what they were talking about however I didn’t want to intrude … I was happy that they found the space inviting and conducive to discussion.

It is lovely spending time with John – if ease of conversation after a period of absence is a measure of friendship then we are indeed very good friends. I could arrive at the fair at least a day later than I do – I don’t have so much that requires me to be on-site for two full days before the first exhibitor event – though if I were to do this I would miss out on all that ’soft’ stuff that gives me so much … time with John as he/we sets up the exhibitors lounge, those warm hugs and exchanges with exhibitors who I have gotten to know over the years, being there to help with things when someone else needs a pair of hands – yesterday working with Alice to install work in a booth were the exhibitors themselves were unable to come even though the ’exhibits’ had already been sent (from Australia).

I had a good chat with Antonie – who like me always has so much going on. I had been hoping that she would be at the fair in one capacity or another I had recently seen that she is working with a young commercial gallery and I wanted to know more. Within minutes she was saying that we should definitely meet with the gallery owner/director and that she had already mentioned me on several occasions. I saw that Antonie is with the gallery when I was looking for information about artworks that a colleague at Region Uppsala had bought – two artists who the region has recently bought something from are with the gallery … I am of course very intrigued and excited by the idea of meeting the gallery owner … knowing that Antonie is with them is a great stamp of approval, knowing that my colleagues buy from them only adds to my interest.

Last night I did something playful, adventurous, brave(?), fun … spurred on by the excitement of the fair I bought tickets for a trip to New York in late August. I am going to go see this year’s Met Fashion Exhibit – Sleep Beauties which will be a once in a life time opportunity to see pieces from their fantastic archive. I still can’t quite believe that I did it … but I did! Something in me has shifted and I have found a ’lust for life’ … a desire ’to let the crazy out’ …

On leaving Liljevalchs (Spring Exhibition, closing day) yesterday afternoon it occurred to me how fortunate I am not to have to depend on selling my work for income. It means that I can continue to produce what I want and need to produce without having to think about it’s marketability or potential for sale. I noted that I was in quite good company – regarding not selling at the Spring Exhibition – I can’t comment on the other artists’ financial situation.

My fantasy is that in the coming days and weeks I will hear from buyers who want to purchase works directly from me … either wanting me to receive the whole cost (rather than the price minus the gallery’s commission), or hoping for a lower price (the gallery’s commission rate is public knowledge as it is a city council venue). I know that fantasies rarely become realities but I am allowing myself to dream.

I have had a great deal of very positive feedback on the work and that is really good. I have some good photographs and that is important. I feel as though I have reached a milestone in becoming a part of the Swedish art-scene. I had a really good spot … a whole wall … in what is usually the last room that people visit – I was given the honour of making the last(ing) impression – and that is something to cherish.