Project Me

There are too many things in the studio that have been untouched for too long.  I want to spend some consolidated time there to take care of this/them.

To this end I wonder if I should apply for an exhibition period at the gallery in the studio building.  Having seen how good the most recent shows there have looked I am both inspired and intimidated.  It has been a while since I had a solo exhibition and the challenge might be exactly what I need to make me prioritise and focus on my own work.  The gallery is not quite a traditional white cube as one wall is entirely glazed and looks out over a major dual carriage way and elevated train lines towards a large industrial area nor, however, is it somewhere that presents immediate stimulus for creating something site-specific.  It is interesting to begin to think about how I might respond to this space, to this possibility.

As a member of the group that works with the gallery bookings it feels odd to consider booking it for myself.  On the other hand I am a member of the group because I am interested in having a dynamic and interesting programme of exhibitions and activities.  Perhaps my sense of awkwardness steams from a concern that I might not achieve my own ambitions for what a good exhibition should be.  Booking a period in April would give me six months to figure out what to do.

Another option would be to invite another artist to show with me and to present a two person show.  Who would I like to show with?  Or perhaps more interestingly who do I think might want to show with me?  Already this questions makes me very aware that I feel out of touch with my potential peer group.  Do I have the nerve to contact a more established artist and ask if they are interested or if they might lend a work?  If I open up that possibility then who might I choose to approach?  If nothing else this is certainly an interesting exercise!

Yesterday I was on an artist’s/architect’s walk as part of the course that I am doing at Mejan Arc.  It reminded me of being a collaborator in Nic Sandiland’s Ambler project ‘Frozen Progress’, thirteen years ago.  During the devising process we walked due north for eight hours guided by tiny compasses – the kind from inexpensive Christmas crackers.  We did this exercise twice, once starting from the Royal Geographic Society in west London, and a second time from a site in north England selected by throwing a dart at a map of the UK.  Remembering these and other experiences from that project is giving me clues about how I might develop my work for the course.

‘Frozen Progress’ excerpt

It was not my intention but I have just re-read my posts from immediately after John died (December 2007).  I am delighted to see that they are still there as they were not obvious last time I logged in.  John has been in my thoughts a lot lately, and was very much there last Friday when I attended the premiere of ‘Chicago’.  Musicals, on stage preferably, were one of John’s passions and I am sure that it would delight and amuse him greatly to know that I have ended up being, albeit tangentially, involved in the world.  The show is great, although I was too busy trying to see how everything ‘worked’ to really enjoy the number that featured all the feathers and headdresses that I have been working on over the summer.

The work with Tim has been really good fun, and I am continuing to assist on a couple of other jobs that he has.  Assisting is something that I have thought about, and even envied.  It is something that I had considered myself too old for – thinking about how tough it can be to become an artist’s assistant in London.  In many ways I am perfectly suited to it, at least in a part-time capacity.  I get to do something practical, I am required to use and develop my skills, often the work is (wonderfully) labourious which gives me time to fantasise.  The challenge of making my hand(s) invisible has given me new perspectives on responsibility, authenticity and creativity.

Driving back to his studio after a fitting one day Tim explained that he considers that I work “with him” rather than “for him”.  He is right to point out that it is an important distinction, and I am very pleased that he values not only what I do but who I am.  The route north in and out of Stockholm to and from Tim’s studio goes past John’s cemetery, I am aware how I quieten down as we go by.  I say a silent hello.

And now term has begun and I am teaching and studying again!  My recent running around is not sustainable and I want to have some kind of routine.  I need to have some kind of routine!  Not least with my writing here.  I miss it, and I miss reading other blogs.  Yesterday the weather was undeniably autumnal, after an extended summer break it feels like a good, and appropriate,  time to cosy back in to ‘Project Me’!

Oh I am missing having easy access to a computer!  I am in Stockholm, at the studio, for a couple of days before returning to the countryside for a few more (computer-less) weeks.

After not posting anything for a while it is difficult to know where/how to start …

I am feeling very inspired and am looking forward to the autumn when I will have more time here.  The last two days have been spent sorting out the materials that I dumped here when I cleared my locker, shelf, and table at Mejan.  It feels so good to be here amongst my own things and in my own space.  Preparation can be very enjoyable in itself!

The summer has turned out to be far more interesting and inspiring than I thought it would be.  By chance back in late spring I met Sweden’s only “plume maker”, after chatting for a while he asked if I might be interested in assisting with feathers for some costumes he would be dressing for a forthcoming production of Chicago.  And that it what I started doing last week!  It is a new area to me, and yet at the same time I am using and adapting skills and experience that I already have.  Learning to mix dyes is though entirely new to me – and is fascinating after all the years of working with my materials pre-existing colour(s).  Next week we begin to make steel-wire structures for the headdresses and ‘bustles’ that will be worn by the dancers.  Tim’s studio is in the middle of the countryside above the stables on the farm where he and his partner live.  It is a room packed with feathers, sewing machines, drawers of sequins and beads, rolls of cloth, shelves full of the patterns he has made for many of Sweden’s best-known performers.  There are a couple of mannequins, and beneath the large worktable there are usually four dozing Jack Russells.  His passion and enthusiasm is quite infectious and it is perhaps therefore that I find myself dreaming about my own ideas as I stir about lengths of boas (feather!) in vats of decadent, but slightly grubby, shades of purple.

Thoughts about how I want to approach the ‘Walk on the Wild Side’ course are also coming up.  My proposal is to research the contemporary gay city – does ‘the city’ have the same draw for gay men now that smart-phone apps and the internet make contact/identification with other gay men possible no matter where you are.  And at the same time as this de-locating of one aspect of city’s former functions for gay identity, there is increasing interest in gay and lesbian retirement flats – the first in Stockholm opened last year.

This year has seen the return of a temporary public art exhibition in Norrtalje (the county town in the area where I am spending the summer).  After a two year break, and now managed by the council rather than an artist’s group, the show which sites work in the river that runs through the town centre has made a welcome come-back.  Looking at the current work and wondering how I would respond to such an event, an idea started to develop.  I do not know how the artists (usually about seven or eight) are selected but I am going to get in touch the arts officer after the summer.  Elsewhere in the town I noticed that a new ‘culture centre’ is being built, and there is a quite impressive range of public art around the town – standing at just one point on the river bank I was not only able to see some of the temporary works in the river but three permanently installed sculptures doted around in the landscaping.  As far as I can make out the council has taken on the project as it grew too large for the artist’s group to manage, there could be other politics going on but even so it is good to see a council investing in the arts.

Yesterday evening I went for a swim after a day in the studio. I took a 15-minute walk, mainly through woodland, down to the lake that runs through and around the city centre.  The water was pleasantly warm and incredibly clear.  Sitting on the rocks and watching the sun slowly start to set I could not help but smile to myself and acknowledge how much I enjoy doing what I do.

Walking back I collected a few feathers that I am now washing – I want to have some that I can experiment and play with ….